My new girlfriend is inexperienced, conservative, and isn't sensitive - help?

Hi Reddit,

So I've been dating this girl for about a month, she's a virgin. Also, she's quite conservative because of how she was raised, and so at the moment she doesn't want to have penetrative sex. She's very sex curious though, so we've been fooling around, and I'm being respectful of her boundaries. Sex aside though, she's ridiculously gorgeous, fun, intelligent, generally perfect for me- so I want to make it work! She's 21, I'm 25.

Now here's the trouble, with penetrative sex off the table - we have, well, everything else - but, she's not sensitive at all! Kissing, sucking, lip biting her, her neck, her ears, her nipples, her back. She has no reaction, the most I got out of her was two uncontrolled breaths while sucking on her neck and nipples, and I think she might like it a little when I grab her butt? She does try to react though, and when she does and I'm curious if it was really something - I ask her - and she says "a tiny bit? but yeah I was just doing that so you could feel something! Haha, I think it's just harder for girls"

I'm pretty good at this normally, I'm quite sexually experienced, so I think I'm generally doing everything at least correctly!

She likes it when I caress & kiss her neck, but not at all a strong reaction. The only time she had a strong-ish reaction was when I softly rubbed her clit through her panties while we were kissing, but after about two minutes she pulled my hand away and switched into a cuddle. I'm not sure why she did that, but I figure either she felt she was going too far, or too much stimulation (I think her first time for this too), or she wasn't prepared (she wasn't prepared to have her pants off that night - this was the first time for us, and all spontaneous!)

I'm trying to figure out what she likes, so I'm asking her, trying to gauge, but because she's inexperienced she keeps saying "try whatever you want!"

Tl;dr: any tips for making this girl, who doesn't know what she wants/likes to feel something? Given she's not sensitive & doesn't want to have penetrative sex?



Submitted August 22, 2021 at 11:32PM

Hi Reddit,So I've been dating this girl for about a month, she's a virgin. Also, she's quite conservative because of how she was raised, and so at the moment she doesn't want to have penetrative sex. She's very sex curious though, so we've been fooling around, and I'm being respectful of her boundaries. Sex aside though, she's ridiculously gorgeous, fun, intelligent, generally perfect for me- so I want to make it work! She's 21, I'm 25.Now here's the trouble, with penetrative sex off the table - we have, well, everything else - but, she's not sensitive at all! Kissing, sucking, lip biting her, her neck, her ears, her nipples, her back. She has no reaction, the most I got out of her was two uncontrolled breaths while sucking on her neck and nipples, and I think she might like it a little when I grab her butt? She does try to react though, and when she does and I'm curious if it was really something - I ask her - and she says "a tiny bit? but yeah I was just doing that so you could feel something! Haha, I think it's just harder for girls"I'm pretty good at this normally, I'm quite sexually experienced, so I think I'm generally doing everything at least correctly!She likes it when I caress & kiss her neck, but not at all a strong reaction. The only time she had a strong-ish reaction was when I softly rubbed her clit through her panties while we were kissing, but after about two minutes she pulled my hand away and switched into a cuddle. I'm not sure why she did that, but I figure either she felt she was going too far, or too much stimulation (I think her first time for this too), or she wasn't prepared (she wasn't prepared to have her pants off that night - this was the first time for us, and all spontaneous!)I'm trying to figure out what she likes, so I'm asking her, trying to gauge, but because she's inexperienced she keeps saying "try whatever you want!"Tl;dr: any tips for making this girl, who doesn't know what she wants/likes to feel something? Given she's not sensitive & doesn't want to have penetrative sex?
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