How to I tell my girlfriend I have a BJ/HJ kink?

First off this is a repost, I took it down bc I was getting some backlash. It was my fault though, the title was misleading. Here we go again.

Ok so I've always been like this... I do like sex, A lot! But I've always had a thing for blowjobs or handjobs (I'm into tantra stuff) .. when I watch porn I always end up watching some super sexy videos of women giving a guy a slow sensual massage or those videos where it's simply just a women giving a slow teasing edging handjob. I suppose you could call it a kink? To the point where I could honestly say that I prefer these things rather than actual sex. (Aside from regular sex) BJ's OR HJ's I like them both the same.

Now let me clearify something before people get all crazy on me. I love my girlfriend and love having sex with her, my number one goal in the bedroom is to make sure she is satisfied.. she's 26 I'm 31. I often go down on her during sex (without her even asking). She doesn't really ask for anything when it comes to sex. I have tried asking her before if there is anything she'd like or prefer in the bedroom and her answer is always "I just enjoy having sex with you".. (we pretty much stuck to missionary or cowgirl), and that's the end of the conversation. She doesn't ask me the same question. Never has. If we do anything differently sexually it's because I bring it up. She is however very willing to listen to me if I had something to bring up so I guess it's ok? I just don't think I should have to impossedly tell her "HEY what about what I'd like?" Then explain/teach her what I want sexually. It would take the excitement out of it for me.

My girl and I have sex regularly (about twice a week) we've been together for about 4 years now, I have in fact hinted at this before a few times. I've literally told her that I like blowjobs and I would like to have them more often. I remember I for sure I mentioned it when we first got together and she of course blew me a few times then it was back to just sex... This pretty much has happened every time I've tried to hint at it to her and it's getting hard to deal with the frustration and honestly (boredome). She does go down on me but only as foreplay before sex. What I want is full on start to finish BJ's or HJ's.

So I am looking for a way to tell her straight out... Again... A once and for all way to tell her that I need this. Maybe a few memes pertaining to this situation to break the ice and then talk about it? Idk

I feel like I just need to say that with my exes, I never had to even ask for blowjobs..I would get them all the time. It was hard to get through an entire movie at her or my place without her eventually going down on me. I've been pulled into a random empty room at my old college for a spontaneous blowjob, I've had them in the parking lot before we walked into the theater or restaurant.. I love that I didn't need to ask for it, it was spontaneous Wich made it 1000 times hotter, that and It seemed like it was kind of fun for them, that kind of enthusiasm just makes it 2000 times hotter!

The fact that I could tell that they liked doing it so much that they'd go out of they're way to squeeze in a bj or hj even if It was in a secretive public place was so arousing to me. It made me wanna go out of MY way to please THEM sexually. Does that make sense?

So with all that said Can anyone help with how I can get my gf to understand me?



Submitted July 10, 2021 at 12:15AM

First off this is a repost, I took it down bc I was getting some backlash. It was my fault though, the title was misleading. Here we go again.Ok so I've always been like this... I do like sex, A lot! But I've always had a thing for blowjobs or handjobs (I'm into tantra stuff) .. when I watch porn I always end up watching some super sexy videos of women giving a guy a slow sensual massage or those videos where it's simply just a women giving a slow teasing edging handjob. I suppose you could call it a kink? To the point where I could honestly say that I prefer these things rather than actual sex. (Aside from regular sex) BJ's OR HJ's I like them both the same.Now let me clearify something before people get all crazy on me. I love my girlfriend and love having sex with her, my number one goal in the bedroom is to make sure she is satisfied.. she's 26 I'm 31. I often go down on her during sex (without her even asking). She doesn't really ask for anything when it comes to sex. I have tried asking her before if there is anything she'd like or prefer in the bedroom and her answer is always "I just enjoy having sex with you".. (we pretty much stuck to missionary or cowgirl), and that's the end of the conversation. She doesn't ask me the same question. Never has. If we do anything differently sexually it's because I bring it up. She is however very willing to listen to me if I had something to bring up so I guess it's ok? I just don't think I should have to impossedly tell her "HEY what about what I'd like?" Then explain/teach her what I want sexually. It would take the excitement out of it for me.My girl and I have sex regularly (about twice a week) we've been together for about 4 years now, I have in fact hinted at this before a few times. I've literally told her that I like blowjobs and I would like to have them more often. I remember I for sure I mentioned it when we first got together and she of course blew me a few times then it was back to just sex... This pretty much has happened every time I've tried to hint at it to her and it's getting hard to deal with the frustration and honestly (boredome). She does go down on me but only as foreplay before sex. What I want is full on start to finish BJ's or HJ's.So I am looking for a way to tell her straight out... Again... A once and for all way to tell her that I need this. Maybe a few memes pertaining to this situation to break the ice and then talk about it? IdkI feel like I just need to say that with my exes, I never had to even ask for blowjobs..I would get them all the time. It was hard to get through an entire movie at her or my place without her eventually going down on me. I've been pulled into a random empty room at my old college for a spontaneous blowjob, I've had them in the parking lot before we walked into the theater or restaurant.. I love that I didn't need to ask for it, it was spontaneous Wich made it 1000 times hotter, that and It seemed like it was kind of fun for them, that kind of enthusiasm just makes it 2000 times hotter!The fact that I could tell that they liked doing it so much that they'd go out of they're way to squeeze in a bj or hj even if It was in a secretive public place was so arousing to me. It made me wanna go out of MY way to please THEM sexually. Does that make sense?So with all that said Can anyone help with how I can get my gf to understand me?
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