I (16m) don’t know what to do with my relationship anymore

This is gonna be a long one so buckle up.

So a bit of background before I get into everything. Last summer before my bf and I started dating we were in the talking stage. This consisted of us talking almost everything and just trying to learn more about each other since before then we had never really spoken that much before even though we had several classes together.

After a certain amount of time he starts to call me things like “sexy” and some other inappropriate name I can’t remember considering it was while ago. I tell him several times while trying to be nice that I’m not comfortable with him calling me that and I asked him to stop. He’d get a slight attitude and he’d stop for maybe a day and then go back to the name calling. One day I snapped and I told him to stop and that if he insisted on saying that stuff then I didn’t want to continue talking to him. He got upset and lashed out saying that “he was tired of trying with me being so difficult” and that “he liked me for so long and always wanted to be with me” essentially he was being a r/niceguy and said he was done with me so I blocked him.

A few months later I felt bad about the situation I decided to unblock him and I approached him at school and apologized for snapping on him. He also apologize and said that he had learned from the situation and has changed since then so we agreed to be friendly after that. Since then he started hanging around my friend group at the time I didn’t see it as odd but as I’m writing this I’m noticing that it was kinda weird considering he usually only hung around the football players and athletes.

Anyways, we started texting more often and became friends, after a while we both caught feelings and started dating since we were together more often and it just seemed natural. This is where stuff takes a turn. The first month of the relationship was basically what’d you’d read about in a teenage romance novel . Toward the end of the first month or the second he starts acting how he did over the summer. Except for this time instead of nicknames it was him constantly asking for nudes, him sending them, then getting upset he sent them but I wasn’t sending back. I told him several times I wasn’t ready for that stuff yet and he said he understood but didn’t change his behavior. Then it began to escalate and I just caved in just to get him to stop asking. At the time I didn’t realize that it was essentially almost exactly what he had pulled over the summer.

On top of that pattern of behavior he is also extremely over protective/ jealous and clingy. As for the over protective aspect whenever I mention another guy or my sister ask me about another guy he’ll get jealous and ask if I think they’re hot and if they look better than him. And before anyone asks no not in a joking matter. If my sister ask about another guy he’ll demand to know what she’s talking about hell even if she isn’t asking about a guy if she’s talking to me he’ll demand to know what she’s talking about and if I don’t tell him or ask why he wants to know he’ll get defensive and get an attitude. For example we were playing this game together and the admin of the server (who i think is a guy based off of his character on the game) gave us a bunch of free stuff so I thanked him profusely and I told my bf that he was a really nice guy. He got defensive and said if I thought he was so nice I should go be with him. I obviously got upset and told him that if I wanted any other guy I wouldn’t be with him. I became distant with him because I was still upset and seeing as this wasn’t the first time he’s said something like this and it wasn’t the first time I told him how those comments made me feel. He started to apologize and say that he was being stupid and he was sorry for being stupid and he said stuff like “I’m sorry for being the worst bf ever”. This is how he usually apologizes for when he says that type of thing and he promises he’ll never say anything like that again but he always does.

As for the clingy aspect before about three weeks ago he insisted we talk on the phone all day and go to sleep on the phone and wake up on the phone and stay on all day and repeat the cycle unless one of us absolutely had to hang up. And if we weren’t on the phone then I had to text him back within five minutes or he’d freak out and spam me. About a week ago I talked to him about it and how I felt suffocated and I need more space seriously this time (it wasn’t the first time I tried to ask for more space) or I’d need a break. He freaked out and got upset that I even mentioned a break and promised to give me more. It lasted for maybe a day and then I had to reinforce it by telling him I needed space and hanging up and avoiding talking otp as much as possible (we still ended up otp maybe two or three times a day) and putting my phone on dnd since if my time alone lasted longer than 30 minutes he’d spam me. Lately since there have been cheer try outs I’ve been using practice as an excuse to get more space.

Oh yeah going back to the being rushed to text him back he says that his ex who cheated on him and she used to always take 10 or 15 minutes to text him back so that’s why he acts like that about texting. We’ve talked about this several times and honestly I feel like since we’ve been together almost a year he should trust me enough by now right? I’ve asked him about it and he says he does trust me 100% but I feel like he doesn’t and that’s why he acts like this.

All this stuff has built up and I’ve talked to him about everything I’ve talked about multiple times and honestly I don’t know what to do have this point other than taking a break to figure out what I should do and to clear my head. He really is a nice guy but it’s just like he’s a different person sometimes and I don’t know what to do because I can’t continue if stuff is going to keep being the same.

So reddit should I ask for a break? Or try talking to him about everything again?

Submitted May 15, 2020 at 11:45PM

This is gonna be a long one so buckle up.So a bit of background before I get into everything. Last summer before my bf and I started dating we were in the talking stage. This consisted of us talking almost everything and just trying to learn more about each other since before then we had never really spoken that much before even though we had several classes together.After a certain amount of time he starts to call me things like “sexy” and some other inappropriate name I can’t remember considering it was while ago. I tell him several times while trying to be nice that I’m not comfortable with him calling me that and I asked him to stop. He’d get a slight attitude and he’d stop for maybe a day and then go back to the name calling. One day I snapped and I told him to stop and that if he insisted on saying that stuff then I didn’t want to continue talking to him. He got upset and lashed out saying that “he was tired of trying with me being so difficult” and that “he liked me for so long and always wanted to be with me” essentially he was being a r/niceguy and said he was done with me so I blocked him.A few months later I felt bad about the situation I decided to unblock him and I approached him at school and apologized for snapping on him. He also apologize and said that he had learned from the situation and has changed since then so we agreed to be friendly after that. Since then he started hanging around my friend group at the time I didn’t see it as odd but as I’m writing this I’m noticing that it was kinda weird considering he usually only hung around the football players and athletes.Anyways, we started texting more often and became friends, after a while we both caught feelings and started dating since we were together more often and it just seemed natural. This is where stuff takes a turn. The first month of the relationship was basically what’d you’d read about in a teenage romance novel . Toward the end of the first month or the second he starts acting how he did over the summer. Except for this time instead of nicknames it was him constantly asking for nudes, him sending them, then getting upset he sent them but I wasn’t sending back. I told him several times I wasn’t ready for that stuff yet and he said he understood but didn’t change his behavior. Then it began to escalate and I just caved in just to get him to stop asking. At the time I didn’t realize that it was essentially almost exactly what he had pulled over the summer.On top of that pattern of behavior he is also extremely over protective/ jealous and clingy. As for the over protective aspect whenever I mention another guy or my sister ask me about another guy he’ll get jealous and ask if I think they’re hot and if they look better than him. And before anyone asks no not in a joking matter. If my sister ask about another guy he’ll demand to know what she’s talking about hell even if she isn’t asking about a guy if she’s talking to me he’ll demand to know what she’s talking about and if I don’t tell him or ask why he wants to know he’ll get defensive and get an attitude. For example we were playing this game together and the admin of the server (who i think is a guy based off of his character on the game) gave us a bunch of free stuff so I thanked him profusely and I told my bf that he was a really nice guy. He got defensive and said if I thought he was so nice I should go be with him. I obviously got upset and told him that if I wanted any other guy I wouldn’t be with him. I became distant with him because I was still upset and seeing as this wasn’t the first time he’s said something like this and it wasn’t the first time I told him how those comments made me feel. He started to apologize and say that he was being stupid and he was sorry for being stupid and he said stuff like “I’m sorry for being the worst bf ever”. This is how he usually apologizes for when he says that type of thing and he promises he’ll never say anything like that again but he always does.As for the clingy aspect before about three weeks ago he insisted we talk on the phone all day and go to sleep on the phone and wake up on the phone and stay on all day and repeat the cycle unless one of us absolutely had to hang up. And if we weren’t on the phone then I had to text him back within five minutes or he’d freak out and spam me. About a week ago I talked to him about it and how I felt suffocated and I need more space seriously this time (it wasn’t the first time I tried to ask for more space) or I’d need a break. He freaked out and got upset that I even mentioned a break and promised to give me more. It lasted for maybe a day and then I had to reinforce it by telling him I needed space and hanging up and avoiding talking otp as much as possible (we still ended up otp maybe two or three times a day) and putting my phone on dnd since if my time alone lasted longer than 30 minutes he’d spam me. Lately since there have been cheer try outs I’ve been using practice as an excuse to get more space.Oh yeah going back to the being rushed to text him back he says that his ex who cheated on him and she used to always take 10 or 15 minutes to text him back so that’s why he acts like that about texting. We’ve talked about this several times and honestly I feel like since we’ve been together almost a year he should trust me enough by now right? I’ve asked him about it and he says he does trust me 100% but I feel like he doesn’t and that’s why he acts like this.All this stuff has built up and I’ve talked to him about everything I’ve talked about multiple times and honestly I don’t know what to do have this point other than taking a break to figure out what I should do and to clear my head. He really is a nice guy but it’s just like he’s a different person sometimes and I don’t know what to do because I can’t continue if stuff is going to keep being the same.So reddit should I ask for a break? Or try talking to him about everything again?