How do I (19F) get over the fact that our relationship ended & he’s (20M) not in my life anymore?

So, two months ago, I got out of a ten month relationship. I (20F) decided to end things with my boyfriend (20M) at the time bc I had found out that he was active on Tinder during our relationship & had struck conversations with girls while we were going through a rocky patch. I found out he was active on the dating site when we’re hanging out and I saw he received a notification from Tinder. He told me he was on the app for “shits and giggles” and to “look for friends.” Though the conversations weren’t flirtatious, after discovering his activity, I felt betrayed & couldn’t trust him anymore so I decided to break up with him the day after. This was pretty painful for me to do as he was my best friend and I was very much so in love with him. He was seemingly fine w/ the break up but proceeded to block me on all social media. I reached out once to see if he wanted to meet up to go surfing together, as that was an activity we both loved to do, but he never really followed through w/ the plan and was just very cold and distant with me over text.

Well, he texted me out of the blue two weeks ago. I decided to reply to him because I would really like to pursue a friendship with him and have things be left off on a good note between us. But every time we’re mid way into a conversation he’ll ghost me. He reached out again and we had a good conversation going but than he ghosted. I know it’s time for me to accept the fact that he’s gone and has moved on w/ his life but it’s been so hard for me to mentally let go of our connection. The memories we’ve made together continuously replay in my head and I’m plagued by all these “what ifs.” It’s just crazy how we went from being best friends who travelled the world together to complete strangers.

I know I am the one who chose to end things but the pain of him being out of my life worsens everyday. I feel almost numb. How do I get myself to move on?

TL; DR: trying to move on from a ten month relationship but it’s been hard for me to cope with the loss of him from my life. idk how to get myself to stop living in the past



Submitted April 12, 2020 at 12:08AM

So, two months ago, I got out of a ten month relationship. I (20F) decided to end things with my boyfriend (20M) at the time bc I had found out that he was active on Tinder during our relationship & had struck conversations with girls while we were going through a rocky patch. I found out he was active on the dating site when we’re hanging out and I saw he received a notification from Tinder. He told me he was on the app for “shits and giggles” and to “look for friends.” Though the conversations weren’t flirtatious, after discovering his activity, I felt betrayed & couldn’t trust him anymore so I decided to break up with him the day after. This was pretty painful for me to do as he was my best friend and I was very much so in love with him. He was seemingly fine w/ the break up but proceeded to block me on all social media. I reached out once to see if he wanted to meet up to go surfing together, as that was an activity we both loved to do, but he never really followed through w/ the plan and was just very cold and distant with me over text.Well, he texted me out of the blue two weeks ago. I decided to reply to him because I would really like to pursue a friendship with him and have things be left off on a good note between us. But every time we’re mid way into a conversation he’ll ghost me. He reached out again and we had a good conversation going but than he ghosted. I know it’s time for me to accept the fact that he’s gone and has moved on w/ his life but it’s been so hard for me to mentally let go of our connection. The memories we’ve made together continuously replay in my head and I’m plagued by all these “what ifs.” It’s just crazy how we went from being best friends who travelled the world together to complete strangers.I know I am the one who chose to end things but the pain of him being out of my life worsens everyday. I feel almost numb. How do I get myself to move on?TL; DR: trying to move on from a ten month relationship but it’s been hard for me to cope with the loss of him from my life. idk how to get myself to stop living in the past
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