Does consent have a grey area?

This is a weird question I guess, but it requires a backstory.

I lost my virginity when I was 15 to a guy that was 18 (my states age of consent is 16 but has a close in age exception). I had had a crush on him foreverrrr, and he was well aware of that. Anyway, he picked me up one day with the implication that we were going to hook up to some extent but I made it clear that I didn't want to have sex, but was down for other things. It sounds stupid now, and like I really should have know better but I was 15, idk.

Anyways, it's been 5 years but as I remember it we were doing things together, like touching and oral etc when he starts rubbing the tip of his penis against my vulva, and in that moment I very clearly tell him that I don't want to have sex with him. He just says okay, but continues to stoke himself against me and kissing me. I tell him again that I don't want to have sex with him, because at that point it was incredibly obvious what he wanted, but I never said stop either.

He continued to say that he wasn't going to put it in and continued what he was doing. I then feel like I sort of gave up at that point. I think a mix of it was being turned on and also feeling pressured, and I told him he could stick it in, to which he did. We had sex, for a few minutes until I asked him to stop as it started to hurt me, and he stopped, and took me home.

I didn't want to have sex, because I just felt like I hadn't wanted to give my virginity to him, but I did. I guess my question is if what he did was wrong? I didn't look at it as a big deal when I was younger, but now that I'm almost 20, I feel very taken advantage of, and as if he should have totally stopped when I said to, as it seems obvious to me what he was doing, and that he wanted me to give in. But I guess at the same time I was the one that gave the okay in the end. I don't know.

Submitted January 05, 2020 at 11:38PM

This is a weird question I guess, but it requires a backstory.I lost my virginity when I was 15 to a guy that was 18 (my states age of consent is 16 but has a close in age exception). I had had a crush on him foreverrrr, and he was well aware of that. Anyway, he picked me up one day with the implication that we were going to hook up to some extent but I made it clear that I didn't want to have sex, but was down for other things. It sounds stupid now, and like I really should have know better but I was 15, idk.Anyways, it's been 5 years but as I remember it we were doing things together, like touching and oral etc when he starts rubbing the tip of his penis against my vulva, and in that moment I very clearly tell him that I don't want to have sex with him. He just says okay, but continues to stoke himself against me and kissing me. I tell him again that I don't want to have sex with him, because at that point it was incredibly obvious what he wanted, but I never said stop either.He continued to say that he wasn't going to put it in and continued what he was doing. I then feel like I sort of gave up at that point. I think a mix of it was being turned on and also feeling pressured, and I told him he could stick it in, to which he did. We had sex, for a few minutes until I asked him to stop as it started to hurt me, and he stopped, and took me home.I didn't want to have sex, because I just felt like I hadn't wanted to give my virginity to him, but I did. I guess my question is if what he did was wrong? I didn't look at it as a big deal when I was younger, but now that I'm almost 20, I feel very taken advantage of, and as if he should have totally stopped when I said to, as it seems obvious to me what he was doing, and that he wanted me to give in. But I guess at the same time I was the one that gave the okay in the end. I don't know.