Was I right or wrong in my approach and what should I do now?

I recently met this girl at work about a month ago and like shes always been flirty with me saying shes my gf and things like that to another colleague. At first I brushed it off as a joke but in the past week or two we’ve been hanging out just the two of us after work and I feel like I’m developing some feelings for this person. We text daily but act like we don’t know each other at work because we don’t want our bosses to know somethings going on.

Fast forward to last night, I asked her if she actually likes me and told her that I don’t want our friendship/relationship to be a game as I’m starting to become invested in it. She told me she had some feelings for me but isn’t ready for a relationship as we both don’t really know each other that well. I agreed with her but told her that I just wanted to be clear as to what is happening between us so we don’t take it down the wrong path. Now it feels like I was maybe a bit too confrontational as she didn’t really take it kindly.

We both haven’t been in a relationship for about 3 years now but she tells me shes not ready for one and yet leaves me hanging with the way she talks to other people about “us” as a couple. Was I wrong to be direct? Did I ruin our chances of actually becoming a couple? I’m so lost, someone please tell me what I should do.

TLDR; confronted a girl who was flirty with me if she meant the things shes saying and it didn’t go down well.



Submitted December 11, 2019 at 12:23AM

I recently met this girl at work about a month ago and like shes always been flirty with me saying shes my gf and things like that to another colleague. At first I brushed it off as a joke but in the past week or two we’ve been hanging out just the two of us after work and I feel like I’m developing some feelings for this person. We text daily but act like we don’t know each other at work because we don’t want our bosses to know somethings going on.Fast forward to last night, I asked her if she actually likes me and told her that I don’t want our friendship/relationship to be a game as I’m starting to become invested in it. She told me she had some feelings for me but isn’t ready for a relationship as we both don’t really know each other that well. I agreed with her but told her that I just wanted to be clear as to what is happening between us so we don’t take it down the wrong path. Now it feels like I was maybe a bit too confrontational as she didn’t really take it kindly.We both haven’t been in a relationship for about 3 years now but she tells me shes not ready for one and yet leaves me hanging with the way she talks to other people about “us” as a couple. Was I wrong to be direct? Did I ruin our chances of actually becoming a couple? I’m so lost, someone please tell me what I should do.TLDR; confronted a girl who was flirty with me if she meant the things shes saying and it didn’t go down well.
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