Confused about my FWB

So I F26 have a FWB that M21. In the beginning it started off pretty good. He talk to me everyday and we would snap each other pictures of us. Before it was just flirting and than we start touching each other. I was a Virgin and he knew. He told me he would take it slow with me. We met up like 3 times before we stopped, but we didn’t have sex yet. Just a lot of making out, touching and grinding. He ended it because he was scare it would jeopardize our friendship. I made it super clear that I wouldn’t have became FWB if I thought it would jeopardize our friendship.

4 months later he hit me up again. That’s when I learned and gave him a blowjob for the first time. We only hit each other up once a month. The other two months he actually tried to penetrate me but it didn’t work. It felt like he was kind of rushing it. The foreplay wasn’t long enough and I wasn’t really wet. Normally when I’m hella turn on, I’m super wet but idk if it was because I was nervous or not relax enough. I feel like it was my fault and he’s probably tired of trying or something. When I ask him if he has condom, he say he’s only sticking it in for a little bit. Luckily we haven’t really fucked. He’s been in me and it hurts but it keep slipping out. The most embarrassing thing happened when he was in me.... my vagina made farting noises bc there was air in it. >____< I hope he didn’t think I farted.

Every time I leave he tells me this is once in a while and who knows when we’ll do it again. It’s been almost 3 months since he last hit me up. He always have been the one that hit me up. I don’t know if I’m able to. When we’re with our friends I’m sooooo tempted to touch him, but than again I don’t know if I can. He always have made the first move but he hasn’t whenever he had the chance. I want to message him and ask him if this “once in a while thing” is still on but I’m scared.

Sometimes I feel like if I approach him about it he would just put up a barrier or like scares him. Or thinks I’m attached to him, which I’m not! I just to know what’s going on and to be on the same page. He doesn’t seem like the type that would communicate about these stuff. Before we ended it, it seem like we had an open communication. Now I just don’t know. Like our friends doesn’t know we’re fwb and I‘m totally normally around him when we’re with our friends. He would playfully hit on other girls while I’m there, which I’m totally fine but he doesn’t talk to me. He can’t even look at me in the eye when we talk. Like I don’t even know how it would be like if we were alone in his car.

Idk if I’m still a Virgin or not (probably not). I finally found someone I truly trust to explore sexually with and now this! LOL IM JUST A GIRL WHO WANTS to be touched, fucked and learn more! I wanna learn more about my body with another person that KNOWS and how to make another person feels good. I’m not a vanilla person and I probably seem like I was bc I didn’t know what to do yet. I’ve kept debating over and over if I should just message him and ask but I’m scared. Partially because he would say he wants to end it or be awkward around me. Maybe I’m overthinking it.

Sorry guys. I just needed to take it off my chest, see if anyone had similar experience and what other have to say. I’m pretty open about everything. Thank you for reading my long post.

Submitted October 28, 2019 at 12:08AM

So I F26 have a FWB that M21. In the beginning it started off pretty good. He talk to me everyday and we would snap each other pictures of us. Before it was just flirting and than we start touching each other. I was a Virgin and he knew. He told me he would take it slow with me. We met up like 3 times before we stopped, but we didn’t have sex yet. Just a lot of making out, touching and grinding. He ended it because he was scare it would jeopardize our friendship. I made it super clear that I wouldn’t have became FWB if I thought it would jeopardize our friendship.4 months later he hit me up again. That’s when I learned and gave him a blowjob for the first time. We only hit each other up once a month. The other two months he actually tried to penetrate me but it didn’t work. It felt like he was kind of rushing it. The foreplay wasn’t long enough and I wasn’t really wet. Normally when I’m hella turn on, I’m super wet but idk if it was because I was nervous or not relax enough. I feel like it was my fault and he’s probably tired of trying or something. When I ask him if he has condom, he say he’s only sticking it in for a little bit. Luckily we haven’t really fucked. He’s been in me and it hurts but it keep slipping out. The most embarrassing thing happened when he was in me.... my vagina made farting noises bc there was air in it. >____< I hope he didn’t think I farted.Every time I leave he tells me this is once in a while and who knows when we’ll do it again. It’s been almost 3 months since he last hit me up. He always have been the one that hit me up. I don’t know if I’m able to. When we’re with our friends I’m sooooo tempted to touch him, but than again I don’t know if I can. He always have made the first move but he hasn’t whenever he had the chance. I want to message him and ask him if this “once in a while thing” is still on but I’m scared.Sometimes I feel like if I approach him about it he would just put up a barrier or like scares him. Or thinks I’m attached to him, which I’m not! I just to know what’s going on and to be on the same page. He doesn’t seem like the type that would communicate about these stuff. Before we ended it, it seem like we had an open communication. Now I just don’t know. Like our friends doesn’t know we’re fwb and I‘m totally normally around him when we’re with our friends. He would playfully hit on other girls while I’m there, which I’m totally fine but he doesn’t talk to me. He can’t even look at me in the eye when we talk. Like I don’t even know how it would be like if we were alone in his car.Idk if I’m still a Virgin or not (probably not). I finally found someone I truly trust to explore sexually with and now this! LOL IM JUST A GIRL WHO WANTS to be touched, fucked and learn more! I wanna learn more about my body with another person that KNOWS and how to make another person feels good. I’m not a vanilla person and I probably seem like I was bc I didn’t know what to do yet. I’ve kept debating over and over if I should just message him and ask but I’m scared. Partially because he would say he wants to end it or be awkward around me. Maybe I’m overthinking it.Sorry guys. I just needed to take it off my chest, see if anyone had similar experience and what other have to say. I’m pretty open about everything. Thank you for reading my long post.