Just need personal opinions on if this was a date or if we “hung out”

There’s a long background to how I met john* [28m] (the one I went on a possible date with) here is the shortened version of it.

I [24f] met Alex on a dating website, we somehow got along swimmingly, things went a little fast while we were talking, and when we finally met for a date the date just kinda went meh, and Alex decided to not go out with me again.

While Alex and I talked he mentioned John several times and about how much we had in common. So I took a leap of faith in making a new friend and straight up asked Alex if he could ask John if he was cool with me having his number. John said yes and we started texting.

At first John and I talked about once or twice a day. Usually just a few texts about random stuff. Sometimes about music, sometimes about work, sometimes about family.

He mentioned he was leaving out of the country for a week and asked if I wanted to meet up before then. I was busy so I didn’t get a chance to come see him (both Alex and John live in a bigger city about an hour and a half from me).

While he was gone I got a few snapchats from him but we didn’t talk that much. I talked about my dating life a little bit, still just viewing John as a friend, and (oops) mentioned a really good first date I had.

John got back into town and I asked if he still wanted to meet up. He said he was down and I could pick any day and he would make it work. So I chose Wednesday (yesterday) and we went out.

I drove to his place, he stood outside to make sure I could park. We greeted each other with a hug. We walked to a nearby bar for trivia. We both sucked at it. But it was fun. It was actually kind of a lot of fun overall to just talk to him. We talked about our parents, we talked about our childhoods, we made dumb jokes. Since he had been to the bar more than me I let him order my food, I ordered a few drinks, and he insisted on paying for it all.

We walked back to his place and he had gotten my favorite drink that I mentioned before, it was awfully nice. We listened to music, and talked some more. Eventually we put on a movie to watch, and when he noticed I was sleepy he asked me to cuddle. I fell asleep while cuddling and he laid there until I woke up.

I was already planning on sleeping on the couch if I had spent the night and told him he could sleep in his bed, that it was fine, since I knew he had to be up early for work. (He only has a twin bed so it’s difficult for two people to be in it)

He brought me blankets and a pillow and we went about our night.

This morning when his alarm went off I gathered my stuff, he got outta bed and we hugged goodbye. He was orginally supposed to visit my city but I had to change plans last minute, so I mentioned him visiting me sometime soon and he said he wants to.

He texted me to make sure I got home safe, he told me he had a great time. We’ve texted back and forth a bit through the day just making dumb jokes. He texts me a lot more frequently than before his trip.

Anyway, he is hosting some event tonight and I haven’t been able to talk to him and I noticed a little bit of me wanted to just...be around him. I think I developed a crush?

And now I’m wondering if he viewed our hang out as a date? In your opinion from just objectively what happened, would you think it was date?

He didn’t try and kiss me, and so I’m wondering if the interest level was purely platonic.

TLDR: went out as friends, I developed a crush, but then looking back I’m not sure if we just hung out or went on a date

Submitted August 22, 2019 at 11:44PM

There’s a long background to how I met john* [28m] (the one I went on a possible date with) here is the shortened version of it.I [24f] met Alex on a dating website, we somehow got along swimmingly, things went a little fast while we were talking, and when we finally met for a date the date just kinda went meh, and Alex decided to not go out with me again.While Alex and I talked he mentioned John several times and about how much we had in common. So I took a leap of faith in making a new friend and straight up asked Alex if he could ask John if he was cool with me having his number. John said yes and we started texting.At first John and I talked about once or twice a day. Usually just a few texts about random stuff. Sometimes about music, sometimes about work, sometimes about family.He mentioned he was leaving out of the country for a week and asked if I wanted to meet up before then. I was busy so I didn’t get a chance to come see him (both Alex and John live in a bigger city about an hour and a half from me).While he was gone I got a few snapchats from him but we didn’t talk that much. I talked about my dating life a little bit, still just viewing John as a friend, and (oops) mentioned a really good first date I had.John got back into town and I asked if he still wanted to meet up. He said he was down and I could pick any day and he would make it work. So I chose Wednesday (yesterday) and we went out.I drove to his place, he stood outside to make sure I could park. We greeted each other with a hug. We walked to a nearby bar for trivia. We both sucked at it. But it was fun. It was actually kind of a lot of fun overall to just talk to him. We talked about our parents, we talked about our childhoods, we made dumb jokes. Since he had been to the bar more than me I let him order my food, I ordered a few drinks, and he insisted on paying for it all.We walked back to his place and he had gotten my favorite drink that I mentioned before, it was awfully nice. We listened to music, and talked some more. Eventually we put on a movie to watch, and when he noticed I was sleepy he asked me to cuddle. I fell asleep while cuddling and he laid there until I woke up.I was already planning on sleeping on the couch if I had spent the night and told him he could sleep in his bed, that it was fine, since I knew he had to be up early for work. (He only has a twin bed so it’s difficult for two people to be in it)He brought me blankets and a pillow and we went about our night.This morning when his alarm went off I gathered my stuff, he got outta bed and we hugged goodbye. He was orginally supposed to visit my city but I had to change plans last minute, so I mentioned him visiting me sometime soon and he said he wants to.He texted me to make sure I got home safe, he told me he had a great time. We’ve texted back and forth a bit through the day just making dumb jokes. He texts me a lot more frequently than before his trip.Anyway, he is hosting some event tonight and I haven’t been able to talk to him and I noticed a little bit of me wanted to just...be around him. I think I developed a crush?And now I’m wondering if he viewed our hang out as a date? In your opinion from just objectively what happened, would you think it was date?He didn’t try and kiss me, and so I’m wondering if the interest level was purely platonic.TLDR: went out as friends, I developed a crush, but then looking back I’m not sure if we just hung out or went on a date