Frustration with the dating dynamic

I (19m) find myself getting frustrated with the feeling that because I'm a guy I constantly have to be chasing girls and trying to make things happen while a girl can sit back and wait for people to try and talk to them. I know that's a simplified version of reality but I hope it gets my point across. I can give my very best effort and still not even be able to get a text back where as a girl will have guys reach out to pursue them. Do girls ever pursue guys? How do I deal with that frustration of that dynamic, regardless of its accuracy, how to I stop it from frustrating me? Some of this probably stems from my recent first break up, my ex was incredibly attractive and I knew she was talking to guys just a few days or weeks after she broke up with me while I'm left still broken hearted and unable to get a good date months later and from time to time that makes me so angry. I treated my ex absolutely amazing, she really didn't treat me well at all during the relationship in hindsight and she treated me absolutely horrible through the break up. But, just because shes a girl and she's attractive she still gets tons of attention even though her personality is undeserving of it. This. Fucking. Bothers. Me. And it bothers me I still fucking want her. Even though she treated me horrible she's so attractive and even though I know she treats me bad she was my first and her beauty still controls me and it bothers me. The whole dynamic is frustrating to me



Submitted August 31, 2019 at 12:17AM

I (19m) find myself getting frustrated with the feeling that because I'm a guy I constantly have to be chasing girls and trying to make things happen while a girl can sit back and wait for people to try and talk to them. I know that's a simplified version of reality but I hope it gets my point across. I can give my very best effort and still not even be able to get a text back where as a girl will have guys reach out to pursue them. Do girls ever pursue guys? How do I deal with that frustration of that dynamic, regardless of its accuracy, how to I stop it from frustrating me? Some of this probably stems from my recent first break up, my ex was incredibly attractive and I knew she was talking to guys just a few days or weeks after she broke up with me while I'm left still broken hearted and unable to get a good date months later and from time to time that makes me so angry. I treated my ex absolutely amazing, she really didn't treat me well at all during the relationship in hindsight and she treated me absolutely horrible through the break up. But, just because shes a girl and she's attractive she still gets tons of attention even though her personality is undeserving of it. This. Fucking. Bothers. Me. And it bothers me I still fucking want her. Even though she treated me horrible she's so attractive and even though I know she treats me bad she was my first and her beauty still controls me and it bothers me. The whole dynamic is frustrating to me

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