Wife is suuuuper Vanilla

Context: Me (M25) and my wife (F25) have been together for a little over 2 years. She is introverted and I’m a mix but mostly extroverted. I have had many (20+) sexual partners and I think she has only been with like less than 10.

So to the point our sex life is slow already we have sex like 2-3 times a month. When we do it’s either her on top and then missionary, missionary then doggy, or just straight up missionary only. I am a very open person and have been trying to figure out what exactly like she’s into or that she likes (tried asking what she likes and she deflected with “idk whatever you like”). She says she likes choking but I think she only says that cause it’s like the go to “norm” and I would to do more and improve out sex life. I enjoy literally just pleasing her like I love just anything that involves her having a good time. We don’t have a problem with orgasms it’s every time for the both of us. But I want to give more and push past our limits in a sense. But I just feel shut down every time.

Every time we do have sex I pretty much always have to initiate it and it’s always the same way cause I just don’t have the information to know what gets the engine going except the same old let’s cuddle and “somehow” find myself down her pants.

I care for our sexual desires but I’m not sure what to do to from here.

What I do know is I wanna please her more which in turn pleases me more.



Submitted December 01, 2021 at 12:55AM

Context: Me (M25) and my wife (F25) have been together for a little over 2 years. She is introverted and I’m a mix but mostly extroverted. I have had many (20+) sexual partners and I think she has only been with like less than 10.So to the point our sex life is slow already we have sex like 2-3 times a month. When we do it’s either her on top and then missionary, missionary then doggy, or just straight up missionary only. I am a very open person and have been trying to figure out what exactly like she’s into or that she likes (tried asking what she likes and she deflected with “idk whatever you like”). She says she likes choking but I think she only says that cause it’s like the go to “norm” and I would to do more and improve out sex life. I enjoy literally just pleasing her like I love just anything that involves her having a good time. We don’t have a problem with orgasms it’s every time for the both of us. But I want to give more and push past our limits in a sense. But I just feel shut down every time.Every time we do have sex I pretty much always have to initiate it and it’s always the same way cause I just don’t have the information to know what gets the engine going except the same old let’s cuddle and “somehow” find myself down her pants.I care for our sexual desires but I’m not sure what to do to from here.What I do know is I wanna please her more which in turn pleases me more.
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