/u/DustiestArcher on Is this ace or weird libido?

Not gonna label you but it does sound VERY ace.

From what my friends (both male and female) have descibed sexual attraction to be like, it's like they cant help thinking about physical features and wanting to do things when they see someone hot. Along with physical feelings like butterflies or blushing etc.

I'd say being on the ace spectrum is when you're missing some aspect of THAT^ (also the stuff on that other person's link was a good description of all the stuff my friends feel which I don't)

Not necessarily anything about fantasies or whether you do or don't enjoy some activities

It's helpful to remember that being ace is a whole spectrum and there's so many aspects to it that not everything matches up exactly between people or even within the same identity on the ace spectrum. Combining multiple aspects which are 100'/, valid individually, doesn't make them less valid when seen as a whole person.

Fantasies? valid.

Sex favourable? valid.

Like women only? valid. (note this is called "heteroromantic")

Don't experience sexual attraction? valid.

I really would say you're somewhere on the ace spectrum from what you've described and not having experienced what that other person linked to (which is a pretty common reference and something most aspec agree on not/rarely feeling).

The fact that you even know ace exists also kind of points to you being ace. It's not a well known sexuality, usually the people who know about it are the ones who've been searching and searching to find a identity that fit..... or of course LGBT+ advocates, counsellors etc.

It sounds more like you're self doubting that you "qualify" to call yourself ace, which is super common for heteroromantic aces.

Dude don't worry about it.

You call yourself whatever fits and if right now 'Ace' is the best fit we aren't gonna shoot you down if later you find a better label.

May 22, 2021 at 11:28PM