How to express wanting to see more "Effort"

I second guess myself on everything lately. Background- Guy (37m) and I (30f) started talking back in June, OLD style. Things progressed and while we haven't had any explicit conversations around defining what are relationship is guy calls me his 'girl' his 'babe' and repeatedly expresses we are a thing and he is a one woman dude. We are on average seeing each other like one night every other weekend, we are somewhat LD. We don't talk on the phone so its really just text in between visits. and those have been....lacking more and more.

Obviously I know we are past the initial getting to know you phase so I dont expect riveting revelations or deep probing questions back to back at this point,,, but aside from a "good morning" "how is your day" and a meme or two that's been the extent the past oh...month? And there are long periods of time he goes silent on me. I do know he enjoys gaming and sometimes naps after work but I feel...neglected? I don't know if i even have a right to feel that way at this point- i don't expect or desire to monopolize all of his time but i want more, especially in the evenings when i'm home from work finally I feel so excited like this is our time to chat away and most days its just nothing.

I don't know how to express that I want more from him with out being too clingy/needy and pushing him away. This feels too early in a relationship to be left feeling lonely and confused.

He also ended his visit abruptly this weekend due to a 'work emergency' which he seemed genuine about, but I found myself giving him the cold shoulder today due to the above feelings pooling up and this recent event- which i know is a childish response and I need to articulate my needs and not 'ghost' him. I just dont know how.

Am I being too needy? Advise on how to approach this with out being needy/accusatory ?



Submitted September 14, 2020 at 11:11PM

I second guess myself on everything lately. Background- Guy (37m) and I (30f) started talking back in June, OLD style. Things progressed and while we haven't had any explicit conversations around defining what are relationship is guy calls me his 'girl' his 'babe' and repeatedly expresses we are a thing and he is a one woman dude. We are on average seeing each other like one night every other weekend, we are somewhat LD. We don't talk on the phone so its really just text in between visits. and those have been....lacking more and more.Obviously I know we are past the initial getting to know you phase so I dont expect riveting revelations or deep probing questions back to back at this point,,, but aside from a "good morning" "how is your day" and a meme or two that's been the extent the past oh...month? And there are long periods of time he goes silent on me. I do know he enjoys gaming and sometimes naps after work but I feel...neglected? I don't know if i even have a right to feel that way at this point- i don't expect or desire to monopolize all of his time but i want more, especially in the evenings when i'm home from work finally I feel so excited like this is our time to chat away and most days its just nothing.I don't know how to express that I want more from him with out being too clingy/needy and pushing him away. This feels too early in a relationship to be left feeling lonely and confused.He also ended his visit abruptly this weekend due to a 'work emergency' which he seemed genuine about, but I found myself giving him the cold shoulder today due to the above feelings pooling up and this recent event- which i know is a childish response and I need to articulate my needs and not 'ghost' him. I just dont know how.Am I being too needy? Advise on how to approach this with out being needy/accusatory ?

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