i cant tell, if shes actually attracted to me

so i matched with a woman on OLD a few months ago, the first message she sent was, "i really like your photos, can i have your instagram @" and i cheekily responded, "you only matched with me to get my instagram?" and she said "yes haha". weird, but i was fine with it, a new follower is a new follower...ever since she started following shes been super attentive to it, will always be one of the first people to look at my stories, all of them, i post pretty often, and once in awhile shell slide in to my dms and comment on this or that photo.

fast forward a couple months and she jumps into my dms about one of my photos and asks why i havent followed her back and i said "because you said you were only interested in my ig" she replied "true but im interested in you now"...ok, great, so i put a little bit more effort into my banter whenever she messages me and weve been going back and forth a bit, mostly just benign topics.

shes chinese grew up there but has lived in the states for around 10 years, she went to university here, got a masters, so her english is fine, but not super fluent, i feel like sometimes she doesnt grasp when im trying to be playful flirty.

now to today we are supposed to have an IRL first date this week, but i cant tell if she actually finds me attractive or just finds me interesting, im not sure whether the non flirting from her end is just a language barrier or a cultural thing or has no interest in dating me and she just finds me entertaining...

im not looking to hook up on the first date or anything, but with the virus still happen, im also not that interested in risking getting sick by meeting a stranger just to hang out as friends (its fine if we feel no chemistry IRL and become friends afterwards)

any advice or insight on how to suss out the situation without seeming like im just after a hookup?

thanks!



Submitted June 15, 2020 at 11:47PM

so i matched with a woman on OLD a few months ago, the first message she sent was, "i really like your photos, can i have your instagram @" and i cheekily responded, "you only matched with me to get my instagram?" and she said "yes haha". weird, but i was fine with it, a new follower is a new follower...ever since she started following shes been super attentive to it, will always be one of the first people to look at my stories, all of them, i post pretty often, and once in awhile shell slide in to my dms and comment on this or that photo.fast forward a couple months and she jumps into my dms about one of my photos and asks why i havent followed her back and i said "because you said you were only interested in my ig" she replied "true but im interested in you now"...ok, great, so i put a little bit more effort into my banter whenever she messages me and weve been going back and forth a bit, mostly just benign topics.shes chinese grew up there but has lived in the states for around 10 years, she went to university here, got a masters, so her english is fine, but not super fluent, i feel like sometimes she doesnt grasp when im trying to be playful flirty.now to today we are supposed to have an IRL first date this week, but i cant tell if she actually finds me attractive or just finds me interesting, im not sure whether the non flirting from her end is just a language barrier or a cultural thing or has no interest in dating me and she just finds me entertaining...im not looking to hook up on the first date or anything, but with the virus still happen, im also not that interested in risking getting sick by meeting a stranger just to hang out as friends (its fine if we feel no chemistry IRL and become friends afterwards)any advice or insight on how to suss out the situation without seeming like im just after a hookup?thanks!
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