I’m in need of advice on how to talk to my girlfriend about our sex life

On mobile, so expect typos and sorry for formatting issues ahead of time.

My girlfriend and I have been together for over a year and we’ve been sexually active through out our relationship. However, it’s just been plain vanilla. No other positions but missionary and on her stomach. I always take the time to take care of her before hand, going between her legs and “getting her warmed up”. However, it’s becoming more of a chore. I REALLY hate that I am saying that because I do love her and am planning on proposing to her but not before this issue is talked about. I’ve tried asking her what she likes and she ALWAYS answers that she doesn’t know. I’m having to read her body language and reactions to everything I do. I find it hard/difficult to believe that someone knows 3 days before she gets sick or something but doesn’t know what feels good?

To add, not once has she touched me. Not even offered a blow job, nothing. I make so much of it about her but I’ve never felt her hand on me. And guys, you’ll know what I’m talking about here but I’m craving that feeling that you get when the one you love grabs you.

She doesn’t initiate anything either. I’m always the one to initiate and it’s starting to make me think I’m pushing her into things and she doesn’t want to do it. She is just doing it to appease me. That’s probably not the case but it’s become very troublesome to think that way. I NEVER want a woman to feel like I’ve pushed her into doing anything she doesn’t want. I told her from day one that I will always ask before hand and if I’m doing something she doesn’t like, she needs to say something.

I feel like I’ve rambled on but that’s my life in the bedroom. I’m just not sure how to go about talking to her about how I’m feeling and what I’m thinking.. Reddit, I come to you to ask what could possibly be done in my situation?



Submitted March 07, 2020 at 11:06PM

On mobile, so expect typos and sorry for formatting issues ahead of time.My girlfriend and I have been together for over a year and we’ve been sexually active through out our relationship. However, it’s just been plain vanilla. No other positions but missionary and on her stomach. I always take the time to take care of her before hand, going between her legs and “getting her warmed up”. However, it’s becoming more of a chore. I REALLY hate that I am saying that because I do love her and am planning on proposing to her but not before this issue is talked about. I’ve tried asking her what she likes and she ALWAYS answers that she doesn’t know. I’m having to read her body language and reactions to everything I do. I find it hard/difficult to believe that someone knows 3 days before she gets sick or something but doesn’t know what feels good?To add, not once has she touched me. Not even offered a blow job, nothing. I make so much of it about her but I’ve never felt her hand on me. And guys, you’ll know what I’m talking about here but I’m craving that feeling that you get when the one you love grabs you.She doesn’t initiate anything either. I’m always the one to initiate and it’s starting to make me think I’m pushing her into things and she doesn’t want to do it. She is just doing it to appease me. That’s probably not the case but it’s become very troublesome to think that way. I NEVER want a woman to feel like I’ve pushed her into doing anything she doesn’t want. I told her from day one that I will always ask before hand and if I’m doing something she doesn’t like, she needs to say something.I feel like I’ve rambled on but that’s my life in the bedroom. I’m just not sure how to go about talking to her about how I’m feeling and what I’m thinking.. Reddit, I come to you to ask what could possibly be done in my situation?
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