Moving past first couple of dates [M23]

Quick background. I have been out of dating game for close to 5 years due to medical problems(had to follow strict diet and daily routine so I didn’t die), that were recently resolved via operation. Essentially I had no time or confidence to date. Now that I’m finally normal, healthy and confident again I’ve been on a handful of dates. Unfortunately I’ve had little success it terms of moving past the first couple dates. The common theme I’m getting is “I’m a great guy, but they didn’t feel a spark and/or they are too busy to commit”

Am I falling into the nice guy trap? I’ve also considered that maybe I’m just boring, but then I compare myself to others in relationship and I find it hard to believe. I’m not the most interesting man but I’ve at least got hobbies and stories to tell. I’ve even tried being fake and over excited ahaha, but face similar outcomes.

Due to my lack of recent experience, I’ve been pretty cautions in terms of making moves and getting physical. I also know in today’s world it is easy to come off as too aggressive by rushing into things. What am I doing wrong? Should I be more aggressive? Am I just getting unlucky? Or am I just being a tool ahaha?

IF YOU WANT MORE CONTEXT KEEP READING...

Very recently I went on a second date with a girl I thought I hit it off with. The date went well(went on way longer than planned, and insisted on picking up tab for dinner). She invited me inside while I waited for my Uber. I figured if she wanted anything more she would’ve brought me to her room or something other than “come in and wait for your Uber”. So I got my Uber and gave her a quick kiss as I was walking out the door. Beside the weak kiss, I would say everything went well. However she soon hit me up and said after thinking about it she was too busy to commit. Because I don’t have much to build off of this makes little sense. She was the one who insisted on setting up second date. All to realize she was suddenly too busy. This makes my head turn and this is the problem I’m trying to fix.



Submitted November 14, 2019 at 11:59PM

Quick background. I have been out of dating game for close to 5 years due to medical problems(had to follow strict diet and daily routine so I didn’t die), that were recently resolved via operation. Essentially I had no time or confidence to date. Now that I’m finally normal, healthy and confident again I’ve been on a handful of dates. Unfortunately I’ve had little success it terms of moving past the first couple dates. The common theme I’m getting is “I’m a great guy, but they didn’t feel a spark and/or they are too busy to commit”Am I falling into the nice guy trap? I’ve also considered that maybe I’m just boring, but then I compare myself to others in relationship and I find it hard to believe. I’m not the most interesting man but I’ve at least got hobbies and stories to tell. I’ve even tried being fake and over excited ahaha, but face similar outcomes.Due to my lack of recent experience, I’ve been pretty cautions in terms of making moves and getting physical. I also know in today’s world it is easy to come off as too aggressive by rushing into things. What am I doing wrong? Should I be more aggressive? Am I just getting unlucky? Or am I just being a tool ahaha?IF YOU WANT MORE CONTEXT KEEP READING...Very recently I went on a second date with a girl I thought I hit it off with. The date went well(went on way longer than planned, and insisted on picking up tab for dinner). She invited me inside while I waited for my Uber. I figured if she wanted anything more she would’ve brought me to her room or something other than “come in and wait for your Uber”. So I got my Uber and gave her a quick kiss as I was walking out the door. Beside the weak kiss, I would say everything went well. However she soon hit me up and said after thinking about it she was too busy to commit. Because I don’t have much to build off of this makes little sense. She was the one who insisted on setting up second date. All to realize she was suddenly too busy. This makes my head turn and this is the problem I’m trying to fix.
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