I (20F) have panic attacks anytime my boyfriend (20M) and I try to have sex.

I (20F) have panic attacks whenever my boyfriend (20M) and I start to have sex.

I have a very limited sexual history. Just oral sex with an ex, but even then, I would get in my head and start to freak out. I would push my ex away and would jump when they tried to finger me. I loved them and WANTED to have sex. It was like I couldn’t.

My boyfriend and I dated years ago, broke up and recently got back together after we graduated high school. We have lots of emotional history; we grew up together. I love him so much.

I frustrate myself. When we tried to have sex the last time he was in town (he was out of the country for a year and a half) my hands would get numb, my body felt heavy and I started to shake. I was freaking out.

I have no history of sexual trauma. I don’t know what’s wrong. Why can’t I just have sex? It’s like I stop myself. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried that it’s going to hurt. I just don’t think that’s why I’m stopping myself.

Where do I start? How do I seek professional help?

TLDR: I love my boyfriend but every time we try to have sex, I have a panic attack and freak out.



Submitted October 04, 2019 at 12:06AM

I (20F) have panic attacks whenever my boyfriend (20M) and I start to have sex.I have a very limited sexual history. Just oral sex with an ex, but even then, I would get in my head and start to freak out. I would push my ex away and would jump when they tried to finger me. I loved them and WANTED to have sex. It was like I couldn’t.My boyfriend and I dated years ago, broke up and recently got back together after we graduated high school. We have lots of emotional history; we grew up together. I love him so much.I frustrate myself. When we tried to have sex the last time he was in town (he was out of the country for a year and a half) my hands would get numb, my body felt heavy and I started to shake. I was freaking out.I have no history of sexual trauma. I don’t know what’s wrong. Why can’t I just have sex? It’s like I stop myself. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried that it’s going to hurt. I just don’t think that’s why I’m stopping myself.Where do I start? How do I seek professional help?TLDR: I love my boyfriend but every time we try to have sex, I have a panic attack and freak out.
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