/u/commonbrahmin on Trying to come out to my allo boyfriend - this did not go well...

In my experience as a grey ace, I've never been able to have a relationship begin and then later try to explain ace to them. The times when I've had a successful relationship have been when I was up front and overly informative with them before a relationship really kicked off. As uncomfortable as it can be (and, for me, this ability came only with age and experience) to essentially "come out" to any potential romantic partner, it will save you both a world of heartache and feelings of rejection.

I liken my asexuality to my stance on having children. It's unfair to enter a relationship with someone that's diametrically opposed to your position on this issue. It's really like a first date talking point for me. If nothing else, maybe you'll at least expand the ace knowledge to your friend group by opening up about ace to potentials.





September 17, 2021 at 12:50AM

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