(25M) Just once I'd like to ask a girl out who's already shown clues she likes me. Faced with a dilemma where my crush might like me back but she hasn't given any clear signs

Yes, I know I should just ask her out so I can find out.

However, I always fall into the same pattern: I start to like a girl, she starts to like me as a person/friend (although generally we are not friends by the time I ask her out as I try to avoid the whole "friendzone" / hidden expectations dilemma).

Then, after getting what I interpret as signs she likes me, I ask her on a date, only to find out she was not interested in me in that way and doesn't want to go on a date with me. I never get offended because the whole thing came from my misinterpretation of things to begin with.

I'm faced with a dilemma now because it seems like an introverted (but more conventionally attractive than me) girl might have started to like me *first*, which never happens to me. Sometimes I catch her sneaking glances at me, but after making an effort to interact with her, and get to know each other, I'm not convinced that means anything. Although through this process and discovering our social chemistry I started to like her.

I dunno. I could just ask her out and get rejected again since I'm used to it. I'm not convinced she likes me as more than a friend, which is fine, there are other girls. But sometimes I notice her and her friends glancing at me and clearly whispering about me, so I think they can tell that I like her.

But again, I haven't gotten any signs from her that she likes me as more than a friend. So if somehow she is waiting for me to ask her out, she is really good at hiding her feelings. I guess I would be concerned that if she does like me, she is growing impatient with me.

Submitted February 28, 2021 at 12:09AM

Yes, I know I should just ask her out so I can find out.However, I always fall into the same pattern: I start to like a girl, she starts to like me as a person/friend (although generally we are not friends by the time I ask her out as I try to avoid the whole "friendzone" / hidden expectations dilemma).Then, after getting what I interpret as signs she likes me, I ask her on a date, only to find out she was not interested in me in that way and doesn't want to go on a date with me. I never get offended because the whole thing came from my misinterpretation of things to begin with.I'm faced with a dilemma now because it seems like an introverted (but more conventionally attractive than me) girl might have started to like me *first*, which never happens to me. Sometimes I catch her sneaking glances at me, but after making an effort to interact with her, and get to know each other, I'm not convinced that means anything. Although through this process and discovering our social chemistry I started to like her.I dunno. I could just ask her out and get rejected again since I'm used to it. I'm not convinced she likes me as more than a friend, which is fine, there are other girls. But sometimes I notice her and her friends glancing at me and clearly whispering about me, so I think they can tell that I like her.But again, I haven't gotten any signs from her that she likes me as more than a friend. So if somehow she is waiting for me to ask her out, she is really good at hiding her feelings. I guess I would be concerned that if she does like me, she is growing impatient with me.