So....I guess he's not into me? Help me understand.

Someone I (30F) met from Tinder 5 years ago reached out to me earlier this year. He (32M) found on Instagram via suggestions. After a few messages back and forth, he asked me out. Unfortunately Covid-19 placed us under a lock down so we couldn't meet. We agreed to meet once it's safe to do so.

We finally had our first date in July and it was really nice. I told him straight from the beginning that I was only interested in a serious relationship. He responded with, "We'll see how it goes." He made an attempt to have sex with me, which I denied. I didn't feel comfortable with that but I was okay with making out with him. Before leaving, we had a kiss goodbye.

Since then, we've been having 1-2 dates every week for a month, which were initiated by the both of us. We had sex by the second date and have done so on every date after. He was also the one that told me he misses me by the second date. We planned on doing many activities together in the following months. I thought we had great times together, have many similar interest, similar values, and sure there were a few silences, but I thought they were comfortable silences.

Despite having a wonderful time together, the one thing I had an issue with was his texting. His responses were short or he takes a few hours to respond, which makes it difficult to create a flow in the convo. I called him out on it on the second date and he explained he's better at having conversations in person. I accepted his response and he's also started to respond to my messages faster.

This past weekend, he stopped texting me. Usually we text everyday, if I don't initiate he would. Nothing too much, like 'How's your day?' So this Monday, I inquired about his weekend and he ended it with me.

He wrote:

[Name]...I've been doing some thinking and I'm so sorry but I don't think I want to pursue this further. Please don't think it's you. You're such a sweet and nice person. I was in a relationship earlier this year and I thought I'd be ready to date again but I don't think I'm emotionally there. You deserve someone who can give you 100% of themselves and I just feel it's unfair to you.

I feel like I'm going crazy and can't make sense of this. I miss him terribly.

Submitted August 26, 2020 at 11:38PM

Someone I (30F) met from Tinder 5 years ago reached out to me earlier this year. He (32M) found on Instagram via suggestions. After a few messages back and forth, he asked me out. Unfortunately Covid-19 placed us under a lock down so we couldn't meet. We agreed to meet once it's safe to do so.We finally had our first date in July and it was really nice. I told him straight from the beginning that I was only interested in a serious relationship. He responded with, "We'll see how it goes." He made an attempt to have sex with me, which I denied. I didn't feel comfortable with that but I was okay with making out with him. Before leaving, we had a kiss goodbye.Since then, we've been having 1-2 dates every week for a month, which were initiated by the both of us. We had sex by the second date and have done so on every date after. He was also the one that told me he misses me by the second date. We planned on doing many activities together in the following months. I thought we had great times together, have many similar interest, similar values, and sure there were a few silences, but I thought they were comfortable silences.Despite having a wonderful time together, the one thing I had an issue with was his texting. His responses were short or he takes a few hours to respond, which makes it difficult to create a flow in the convo. I called him out on it on the second date and he explained he's better at having conversations in person. I accepted his response and he's also started to respond to my messages faster.This past weekend, he stopped texting me. Usually we text everyday, if I don't initiate he would. Nothing too much, like 'How's your day?' So this Monday, I inquired about his weekend and he ended it with me.He wrote:[Name]...I've been doing some thinking and I'm so sorry but I don't think I want to pursue this further. Please don't think it's you. You're such a sweet and nice person. I was in a relationship earlier this year and I thought I'd be ready to date again but I don't think I'm emotionally there. You deserve someone who can give you 100% of themselves and I just feel it's unfair to you.I feel like I'm going crazy and can't make sense of this. I miss him terribly.