OLD tips from 30's/F

I have been on & off OLD for over a decade and wanted to share some tips, as there's a lot of people who write "IDK what to say, just MSG me."

Take what you like, leave what you don't.

On mobile, sorry for formatting.

1. Be honest.

With yourself: what do you want? Hook ups, relationships, looking for someone to marry, or anything in between. If you don't know, that's okay. It's more important to be honest than to have a label.

With your profile: there's some stuff you don't have to put on a profile, but be upfront with what you're looking for, hobbies or activities you engage in, some values or beliefs that are important to you. Mention things like: books you liked, games you rocked, role models you value(d). Focus on using positive wording, as you are selling yourself. You don't need to brag, but instead of saying something that's self deprecating, find a different perspective that is more relatable.

Use current photos. It's really concerning how many people use outdated or photoshopped to fuck photos. Don't be this person. You are more than how you look.

With the people you interact with: when messaging find a common interest and try to explore your different perspectives on it. Everybody experiences the world differently, so it's a cool way to understand that person's views. Review and practice effective listening skills if you have trouble chatting with people. I lose interest when I'm asking all the questions.

1. Be prepared.

If you say you're looking for happily ever after, at least have some of your shit together. I spent a week messaging with a very nice person on eHarmony only to learn they "share" a phone with others. It's incredibly inconsistent behaviour with what's expected from a OLD you spend money on. Also, if you can't commit to a phone, don't tell people you want a committed relationship. Be aware of your own inconsistencies and double check you are being honest with yourself.

If you're inviting a date over- clean your place.

Edit: Leave your own tips, I'm too lazy to write more but know there's a wealth of info in this /r

Submitted March 06, 2020 at 11:52PM

I have been on & off OLD for over a decade and wanted to share some tips, as there's a lot of people who write "IDK what to say, just MSG me."Take what you like, leave what you don't.On mobile, sorry for formatting.Be honest.With yourself: what do you want? Hook ups, relationships, looking for someone to marry, or anything in between. If you don't know, that's okay. It's more important to be honest than to have a label.With your profile: there's some stuff you don't have to put on a profile, but be upfront with what you're looking for, hobbies or activities you engage in, some values or beliefs that are important to you. Mention things like: books you liked, games you rocked, role models you value(d). Focus on using positive wording, as you are selling yourself. You don't need to brag, but instead of saying something that's self deprecating, find a different perspective that is more relatable.Use current photos. It's really concerning how many people use outdated or photoshopped to fuck photos. Don't be this person. You are more than how you look.With the people you interact with: when messaging find a common interest and try to explore your different perspectives on it. Everybody experiences the world differently, so it's a cool way to understand that person's views. Review and practice effective listening skills if you have trouble chatting with people. I lose interest when I'm asking all the questions.Be prepared.If you say you're looking for happily ever after, at least have some of your shit together. I spent a week messaging with a very nice person on eHarmony only to learn they "share" a phone with others. It's incredibly inconsistent behaviour with what's expected from a OLD you spend money on. Also, if you can't commit to a phone, don't tell people you want a committed relationship. Be aware of your own inconsistencies and double check you are being honest with yourself.If you're inviting a date over- clean your place.Edit: Leave your own tips, I'm too lazy to write more but know there's a wealth of info in this /r