To those who have given up on dating/relationships, what is your reason for doing so?

My first serious relationship ended really badly and gave me some unhealthy perspective on relationships. Took me a long time to work through it all and get over it, but I still find my self apprehensive to "let myself go" years later. As amazing as love can be, it has the potential to be pure hell.

I had a recent experience where I met a lady and we immediately hit it off well. She came over the next day and we hung out and talked. She revealed to me that she was married, but was about to leave her current husband for another man. She pretty much told me everything and it was our second time ever seeing each other. I think she really didn't have anyone to talk to as she was living a double/triple lifestyle and couldn't share it with her husband/husband to be. She didn't have any real friends. I got honeydicked into being her emotional crutch for a few hours.

I was so flooded with weird emotions and dissonance to why she was so revealing. I thought we were going to hook up and next thing I know she is telling me all this deeply personal stuff. She had zero shame about the situation and was talking about it as casually as a killer talks about murder. It was the weirdest emotional roller coaster of my life and it made me even less trusting of relationships. That moment was sort of the nail in the coffin when it comes to love. It made me realize that it can actually be that bad. I felt sorry for her and the guys who were involved with her.

I don't plan on having kids, nor can I afford them. I like having my personal time to do my hobbies. As much as I like the idea of a relationship, I am terrified by how things can spiral out of control. As much as it sucks, it also relieving at the same time. Maybe 10 years down the road things will be different, but for the foreseeable future, I have given up on looking.

What are your reasons?



Submitted January 17, 2020 at 11:56PM

My first serious relationship ended really badly and gave me some unhealthy perspective on relationships. Took me a long time to work through it all and get over it, but I still find my self apprehensive to "let myself go" years later. As amazing as love can be, it has the potential to be pure hell.I had a recent experience where I met a lady and we immediately hit it off well. She came over the next day and we hung out and talked. She revealed to me that she was married, but was about to leave her current husband for another man. She pretty much told me everything and it was our second time ever seeing each other. I think she really didn't have anyone to talk to as she was living a double/triple lifestyle and couldn't share it with her husband/husband to be. She didn't have any real friends. I got honeydicked into being her emotional crutch for a few hours.I was so flooded with weird emotions and dissonance to why she was so revealing. I thought we were going to hook up and next thing I know she is telling me all this deeply personal stuff. She had zero shame about the situation and was talking about it as casually as a killer talks about murder. It was the weirdest emotional roller coaster of my life and it made me even less trusting of relationships. That moment was sort of the nail in the coffin when it comes to love. It made me realize that it can actually be that bad. I felt sorry for her and the guys who were involved with her.I don't plan on having kids, nor can I afford them. I like having my personal time to do my hobbies. As much as I like the idea of a relationship, I am terrified by how things can spiral out of control. As much as it sucks, it also relieving at the same time. Maybe 10 years down the road things will be different, but for the foreseeable future, I have given up on looking.What are your reasons?
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