Help me with options [27 M] with my recently ex [32 F] and [6M her son] of 3.5 years, are separating but just signed a new lease. She wants to find a roommate to replace her. I don't want a roommate, but cant afford the place on my own.

Hey there everyone. Thanks for reading.

Me and my kind of girlfriend kind of ex just signed a lease together and have decided it's not healthy for us to stay together. We set a minor deadline at the beginning of the summer to see if we could work things out before we needed to re-sign the lease and it seemed fine but rocky but kept getting worse. Well, we signed last week and now shit has hit the fan and neither of us really want to be together.

She wants to take an opportunity she has to move out into subsidized housing and she said she would find a roommate for me. This shocked me because a couple of weeks ago she was telling me she could afford this place on her own and would be ok with being roommates for a few months while I saved money for a down deposit on a place.

Now she is saying it's too toxic and she definitely doesn't want to be roomies but it's ok because she will find someone...

Well, I don't want a roommate. I want to be alone. I can't afford and down qualify for the place we currently live in by myself so I need her to stay because she signed the lease.

I don't want to feel like I'm holding her or her 6-year-old son hostage to my apartment but I don't want to have to meet a new person and have to share a living space with them, especially when I have already lived here a year and it feels like home.

PS. I have no friends I could invite to live with me.

DO I just have to suck this up and let her go? That irritates me because it would get her the space she wants and cheaper housing but it would make me be around a new stranger in my own home....

I want to live in a studio/1bd by myself but I don't think we can break our lease without finding someone to take over anyways....

What to do?

TL;DR I'm very introverted and just want space. The relationship didn't work because I don't want to be open and honest. Girlfriend wants to move out and find a roommate replacement. I don't want a roommate but could be one with her and her son but she doesn't think thats healthy.



Submitted August 13, 2019 at 11:45PM

Hey there everyone. Thanks for reading.Me and my kind of girlfriend kind of ex just signed a lease together and have decided it's not healthy for us to stay together. We set a minor deadline at the beginning of the summer to see if we could work things out before we needed to re-sign the lease and it seemed fine but rocky but kept getting worse. Well, we signed last week and now shit has hit the fan and neither of us really want to be together.She wants to take an opportunity she has to move out into subsidized housing and she said she would find a roommate for me. This shocked me because a couple of weeks ago she was telling me she could afford this place on her own and would be ok with being roommates for a few months while I saved money for a down deposit on a place.Now she is saying it's too toxic and she definitely doesn't want to be roomies but it's ok because she will find someone...Well, I don't want a roommate. I want to be alone. I can't afford and down qualify for the place we currently live in by myself so I need her to stay because she signed the lease.I don't want to feel like I'm holding her or her 6-year-old son hostage to my apartment but I don't want to have to meet a new person and have to share a living space with them, especially when I have already lived here a year and it feels like home.PS. I have no friends I could invite to live with me.DO I just have to suck this up and let her go? That irritates me because it would get her the space she wants and cheaper housing but it would make me be around a new stranger in my own home....I want to live in a studio/1bd by myself but I don't think we can break our lease without finding someone to take over anyways....What to do?TL;DR I'm very introverted and just want space. The relationship didn't work because I don't want to be open and honest. Girlfriend wants to move out and find a roommate replacement. I don't want a roommate but could be one with her and her son but she doesn't think thats healthy.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Add Comments, Posts, Links... etc.

Popular posts from this blog

The difference between being right and being understood

My boyfriend and I are 28. We’ve been together for about 1.5 years and recently moved in together. He’s a pretty patient and easygoing person (Type B) whereas I’m more particular (Type A). Of course there are two sides to every trait, and my Type A nature benefits us in some ways too. Like all couples, we have differences in perspective or preference. When this happens, he will usually say something like “I disagree (with your perspective) but fine.” I tend to push the issue in an attempt to get him to understand where I’m coming from. This escalates the disagreement into a fight because he perceives it as me trying to be “right”. I truly just want to be understood (and I want to understand where he’s coming from) so I’m looking for more of a dialogue whereas he avoids conflict and just wants it to be over as quickly as possible. His general approach is “agree to disagree” but that doesn’t make sense to me when it’s an issue that will keep coming up and requires compromise. I’m n
Read more

My (27f) gf (27f) is getting tired of me not sharing intimate/ personal info about me

I’ve always been extremely private and introverted. We have more than a year together and we’ve been living together for like 6 months, we get along pretty good and I’m really in love with her, however I can not seem to open up... and I can tell it’s frustrating to her by the way she tells me it bothers her that she feels she’s the only one committed and the one that’s always sharing... At this point I don’t even know if it is that I’ve gotten too used to it, to the point I’ve became lazy to talk about myself or give any genuine personal opinion... it sucks, really, I need to communicate better... Where do I start? Tl;dr: I can’t be completely intimate with my gf and its frustrating her, I need to communicate better because I really love her... where to start? Submitted April 25, 2019 at 06:02AM I’ve always been extremely private and introverted. We have more than a year together and we’ve been living together for like 6 months, we get along pretty good and I’m really in love
Read more

My (23M) girlfriend (25F) relationship is confusing to me. I might be the problem, or maybe we are just incompatible.

I met my girlfriend after a few serious breakups that led me to change both intentionally and unintentionally over a few years. For better and for worse. She had just gotten out of an engagement with a verbally and physically abusive man who had a cocaine problem. We have been together about 8 months now. We hit it off and spent a lot of time together but she began to push our relationship as if there were a time clock for milestones. I was pressed beyond my comfort zone and went with it because of my affection for her. My living situation fell apart and I lost a few thousand dollars to shit roommates right around the time she and I met and she offered to let me stay with her. I agreed with some resistance. I pay for food, help her with bills, and throw money toward rent while trying to get back on my feet. As long as we have been together she has gotten more possessive, angry, and irrational. She is dealing with shit from her engagement and I feel shes looking for a level of seriou
Read more