Do I text her or nah?

So back in November I lost my virginity to this girl, we'll call her Claire. We're both seniors in high school, so she was 17 turning 18 and I just turned 18.

We had talked about it beforehand and decided we wanted a friends with benefits situation with an option for something developing if we felt it was right. We fool a few times and I call it off because I don't want anything to develop and I could feel myself becoming attached, even though I didn't like her as a person.

She cried and said she was starting to like me and it was a big ordeal. A month or so passes and I regret cutting it off because I'm a little horndog. So, I try to get things moving again. She tells me she doesnt want to, and that she doesnt want us hanging out end in sex. I ask her why and i never get a straight answer. We end up making out in my car a few days later (though I admit I initiated it). And before things could escalate her mom calls her and she has to go.

I was a little annoyed because I dont understand what had changed between now and before. I expressed this, asking why dont we just be fwb, we both find each other attractive, neither of us want something serious, we both arent emotionally available, so what's the problem?

She never gave me a straight answer. Instead, she led me down a line of thought which ended poorly and we havent spoken since.

This girl is very peculiar because she changes her mind, A LOT. My buddy used to date her (lets not get into it) and they were on and off and spontaneous and everything. Their relationship was strange, they hooked up a couple of times after they broke up, too.

Now, I understand that whatever the reason, if she doesnt want to do something, she doesnt have to. And I respect that. I dont want to push any boundaries or anything. My priority is to not inflict anything upon her or hurt her in any way.

Flash forward to now. We graduate very soon. I might not see her again. I dont have any romantic feelings for her but i'd be lying if i said I didnt want to hook up again. I dont want to be a douchebag, but I dont know if texting her again would make me one. Could I have some guidance please?

Tldr: text previous hookup?



Submitted May 12, 2022 at 12:16AM

So back in November I lost my virginity to this girl, we'll call her Claire. We're both seniors in high school, so she was 17 turning 18 and I just turned 18.We had talked about it beforehand and decided we wanted a friends with benefits situation with an option for something developing if we felt it was right. We fool a few times and I call it off because I don't want anything to develop and I could feel myself becoming attached, even though I didn't like her as a person.She cried and said she was starting to like me and it was a big ordeal. A month or so passes and I regret cutting it off because I'm a little horndog. So, I try to get things moving again. She tells me she doesnt want to, and that she doesnt want us hanging out end in sex. I ask her why and i never get a straight answer. We end up making out in my car a few days later (though I admit I initiated it). And before things could escalate her mom calls her and she has to go.I was a little annoyed because I dont understand what had changed between now and before. I expressed this, asking why dont we just be fwb, we both find each other attractive, neither of us want something serious, we both arent emotionally available, so what's the problem?She never gave me a straight answer. Instead, she led me down a line of thought which ended poorly and we havent spoken since.This girl is very peculiar because she changes her mind, A LOT. My buddy used to date her (lets not get into it) and they were on and off and spontaneous and everything. Their relationship was strange, they hooked up a couple of times after they broke up, too.Now, I understand that whatever the reason, if she doesnt want to do something, she doesnt have to. And I respect that. I dont want to push any boundaries or anything. My priority is to not inflict anything upon her or hurt her in any way.Flash forward to now. We graduate very soon. I might not see her again. I dont have any romantic feelings for her but i'd be lying if i said I didnt want to hook up again. I dont want to be a douchebag, but I dont know if texting her again would make me one. Could I have some guidance please?Tldr: text previous hookup?
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