How do I [25M] fix things with a girl [24F] I've been seeing

So this might be a long story, but I'm hoping someone else can help me out with this.

I've been sort of seeing this Pisces girl for a few months now, and I may have messed things up but I could use help fixing things.

LOONG Context:

We work together, and I started by driving her home every once in a while where we became really close. Our conversations were amazing and there was definitely a spark. There were multiple times I'd pull up to her house and our conversation would literally go on until the sun came up, 6-7 hours without skipping a beat. The only reason I would have to leave is because I work another job in the morning. (I work 2 jobs, roughly 70 hours a week total and she knows that). She once straight up asked me if I like her and I told her yes I normally wouldn't have been honest about it because I don't want to make things awkward, but I can't lie to her. She told me she valued our friendship and didn't want to lose that but it's all she wants, which is something I'm perfectly okay with, so I started to mentally move on.

A few nights later she called me drunk at 3AM saying she wanted to hang out, I still had to work at 9AM but I wanted to see her too so I got out of bed and came (it's a 45 minute drive for me, and again she knows that, but I came anyway). She pulled us both into the back seat and it got pretty hot and heavy. But I said no to sex, because (1) I was completely sober and nervous, she had some to drink which made me even more nervous, (2) I'm not as sexually experienced and I've never had sex in a car before, (3) we didn't have a condom. She told me the next morning that she feels rejected, and cant handle being told no so she wanted to end things.

It was awkward for a bit but then we eventually gravitated towards each other again, she started calling me babe all the time, holding my hand, texting I luv you, and we would again be staying up all night. We went on a 14 hour drive just for no reason and had an amazing time. There were a lot of times I'd drive home the next morning having trouble keeping my eyes open because I work so much but I just really enjoy spending time with her. We'd spend all night talking on the phone too. But there were also things that bugged me, like she'd tell me about the other guys hitting on her, asking me if I'm jealous, and almost rubbing it in my face. But I let her literally go through my phone to see if I was texting other girls (I'm not), but would mention the guys who are talking to her. We aren't official or anything so I did my best to look the other way.

A few nights ago we were starting to go at it again in the car, and I was the one to try and escalate this time because she told me how much she wanted it. But I had plans with my cousins later (which I was okay with being late to). She was eventually the one who stopped me and said I'm on a timeline and she'd call me later. I suggested so much like booking a room, and all kinds of alternatives.

So later that night she calls me and wakes me up at 3:00AM, when we talk and have phone sex (she knows that's also the first time I've done that and I felt awkward about it but I did it anyway and she said I was really good apparently). She then says she wants me to come over right now and bring her home with me (she knows that my whole family is home, and I have conservative immigrant parents). But I was so sleepy I could barely keep my eyes open. I told her I really didn't feel like I could safely drive 40 minutes right now because I had slept like 6 hours over the last 3 days. Then she just decided she wants to end it again.

That this is over, and I'm rejecting her, and she again can't handle being told no.

I just don't know what else I can do, I've done more for this girl than I have for anyone and I want her more than anything in the world because I've never connected like this before with anyone. She falls asleep in my car and I let her sleep for hours because she normally has trouble sleeping. I meet her all the time and spend so much time with her even though I work my fucking ass off. All of which means nothing because I said no to her in this once instance where I didn't feel like I could safely drive.

I really want this to work with her because when things are good we're amazing. We've had so many people tell us that we're basically made for each other, we should just get married already, that we look good together, they see us together and ask how many years we've been together for and we agree that we both make each other really happy but I don't know how to fix this. Now she's being extremely cold with me. I stopped smoking over a year ago and started again after that first fight because it's eating away at me.

Submitted November 20, 2021 at 12:11AM

So this might be a long story, but I'm hoping someone else can help me out with this.I've been sort of seeing this Pisces girl for a few months now, and I may have messed things up but I could use help fixing things.LOONG Context:We work together, and I started by driving her home every once in a while where we became really close. Our conversations were amazing and there was definitely a spark. There were multiple times I'd pull up to her house and our conversation would literally go on until the sun came up, 6-7 hours without skipping a beat. The only reason I would have to leave is because I work another job in the morning. (I work 2 jobs, roughly 70 hours a week total and she knows that). She once straight up asked me if I like her and I told her yes I normally wouldn't have been honest about it because I don't want to make things awkward, but I can't lie to her. She told me she valued our friendship and didn't want to lose that but it's all she wants, which is something I'm perfectly okay with, so I started to mentally move on.A few nights later she called me drunk at 3AM saying she wanted to hang out, I still had to work at 9AM but I wanted to see her too so I got out of bed and came (it's a 45 minute drive for me, and again she knows that, but I came anyway). She pulled us both into the back seat and it got pretty hot and heavy. But I said no to sex, because (1) I was completely sober and nervous, she had some to drink which made me even more nervous, (2) I'm not as sexually experienced and I've never had sex in a car before, (3) we didn't have a condom. She told me the next morning that she feels rejected, and cant handle being told no so she wanted to end things.It was awkward for a bit but then we eventually gravitated towards each other again, she started calling me babe all the time, holding my hand, texting I luv you, and we would again be staying up all night. We went on a 14 hour drive just for no reason and had an amazing time. There were a lot of times I'd drive home the next morning having trouble keeping my eyes open because I work so much but I just really enjoy spending time with her. We'd spend all night talking on the phone too. But there were also things that bugged me, like she'd tell me about the other guys hitting on her, asking me if I'm jealous, and almost rubbing it in my face. But I let her literally go through my phone to see if I was texting other girls (I'm not), but would mention the guys who are talking to her. We aren't official or anything so I did my best to look the other way.A few nights ago we were starting to go at it again in the car, and I was the one to try and escalate this time because she told me how much she wanted it. But I had plans with my cousins later (which I was okay with being late to). She was eventually the one who stopped me and said I'm on a timeline and she'd call me later. I suggested so much like booking a room, and all kinds of alternatives.So later that night she calls me and wakes me up at 3:00AM, when we talk and have phone sex (she knows that's also the first time I've done that and I felt awkward about it but I did it anyway and she said I was really good apparently). She then says she wants me to come over right now and bring her home with me (she knows that my whole family is home, and I have conservative immigrant parents). But I was so sleepy I could barely keep my eyes open. I told her I really didn't feel like I could safely drive 40 minutes right now because I had slept like 6 hours over the last 3 days. Then she just decided she wants to end it again.That this is over, and I'm rejecting her, and she again can't handle being told no.I just don't know what else I can do, I've done more for this girl than I have for anyone and I want her more than anything in the world because I've never connected like this before with anyone. She falls asleep in my car and I let her sleep for hours because she normally has trouble sleeping. I meet her all the time and spend so much time with her even though I work my fucking ass off. All of which means nothing because I said no to her in this once instance where I didn't feel like I could safely drive.I really want this to work with her because when things are good we're amazing. We've had so many people tell us that we're basically made for each other, we should just get married already, that we look good together, they see us together and ask how many years we've been together for and we agree that we both make each other really happy but I don't know how to fix this. Now she's being extremely cold with me. I stopped smoking over a year ago and started again after that first fight because it's eating away at me.