Is it okay to text someone after I turned them down?

Long story short, I met this guy on tinder and we got along really well, let’s call him Dave. Unfortunately we didn’t have the opportunity to meet up in person because shortly after he had to move to a different country for work. He was supposed to stay over there for at least a year. We still kept in touch, I don’t think either of us was actually expecting something out of it at that point but I guess we genuinely liked talking to each other. Eventually the conversation started dying which was expected and I was the one who sent the last message to which he never replied.

Anyway, one random day I get a text from him saying that he came back sooner than expected and he started to be flirty towards me, basically how our conversations used to be. I was really surprised because I honestly wasn’t expecting a text from him at all. At that point I was talking to a guy I used to see way before I met Dave. This other guy and I had agreed to give it another chance so I told Dave that I was seeing someone at that moment. He was very understanding, he said that he was kind of expecting it and wished me the best. As you can already guess things with the other guy ended up not working out and recently I was thinking about texting Dave. I’m not sure whether that’s a good idea though, I’m afraid he’ll interpret it as me trying to have my cake and eat it too. I absolutely don’t mean it that way, it was more of a timing thing I think and we really had a lot of fun talking to each other so now I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to be disrespectful, so how would you guys interpret it?



Submitted September 08, 2021 at 11:46PM

Long story short, I met this guy on tinder and we got along really well, let’s call him Dave. Unfortunately we didn’t have the opportunity to meet up in person because shortly after he had to move to a different country for work. He was supposed to stay over there for at least a year. We still kept in touch, I don’t think either of us was actually expecting something out of it at that point but I guess we genuinely liked talking to each other. Eventually the conversation started dying which was expected and I was the one who sent the last message to which he never replied.Anyway, one random day I get a text from him saying that he came back sooner than expected and he started to be flirty towards me, basically how our conversations used to be. I was really surprised because I honestly wasn’t expecting a text from him at all. At that point I was talking to a guy I used to see way before I met Dave. This other guy and I had agreed to give it another chance so I told Dave that I was seeing someone at that moment. He was very understanding, he said that he was kind of expecting it and wished me the best. As you can already guess things with the other guy ended up not working out and recently I was thinking about texting Dave. I’m not sure whether that’s a good idea though, I’m afraid he’ll interpret it as me trying to have my cake and eat it too. I absolutely don’t mean it that way, it was more of a timing thing I think and we really had a lot of fun talking to each other so now I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to be disrespectful, so how would you guys interpret it?
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