/u/Thornescape on How do I deal with being used?

In my experience, it's actually worse than that. When I talked to people who took this approach, they really didn't care about the bigger picture. They just wanted the man to "prove" that they were really interested, because if they were really interested then they would "work harder to get their attention". They wanted to be desired and chased after because they were amazing and worth fighting for, etc etc. It's very similar to the mindset of women who want men to fight over them.

If you ignore the obvious problems with the approach when applied to other situations, it kind of makes sense. It's exciting and thrilling to be desired and complimented etc. I can understand that feeling. It's intoxicating.

It's a horrific mentality, without a doubt. What's worse is that it's shown up in books and movies and used as a plot device, making more people familiar with the concept and encouraging others to use that model.

It happens enough that sometimes it makes me wonder if it's pushed by directors who want to encourage rape culture.





June 06, 2021 at 11:31PM
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