Why has my FWB gone cold?

I first hooked up with my fwb in high school. I was 16 he was 18. We've hooked up on and off for eight years. At 18, I asked for more, but he made it clear he only wanted sex. I'm 23 now he is 26

We both agreed that if one of us started seeing someone else, we would tell each other, or if one of us was no longer into the FWB situation we would tell each other. He’s very respectful (or was) about this. So all this started in April. I went there last Friday (July 27) and we hooked up and as per usual I left right after. Normally we hook up minimum 2-3x a week plus a lot of sexting. It’s also normal for the texting to slow over the weekend but pick back up literally 7 AM Monday. Well the Monday came and nothing. Tuesday and nothing. Finally I messaged him Wednesday and asked if I could come by for a D session. His reply was “can’t. Busy.” If he’s busy he normally would go off on what he’s busy about. So I said “Oh ok. Haven’t heard from you in a bit. Are you still interested in this?” His response. “My work is very interesting thanks. Some of us aren’t off for the month.” FYI I have a month worth of vacation so I took it all at once but in reality I’m going in for surgery shortly so that’s why I took it off for recovery. So I said “Don’t judge what you don’t know. I’m just asking if you are into this still.” His response “Why? Because I’m busy? We just fcked Friday.” So I said “I’m aware we fcked Friday but normally we would still be hooking up or at least chatting. I’m just asking because what we agreed on is if one of us started dating someone or just wasn’t feeling it anymore we would tell each other.” He said “Haha okay sunshine.” End of conversation.

I went out with my girlfriends last night and we ended up at the same lounge it turns out. Not even 5 mins he was legit darting for the door. I didn’t even notice him there but one of my friends did.

What the heck is happening here? I get that it’s probably done. I don’t have a feelings for him but it’s the fact I feel really crappy being rejected even sexually. That’s what’s really bothering me. Plus the fact we agreed to be open and we were. At one point I was seeing someone so I paused the whole thing for a couple weeks. Didn’t work out so we went back to the usual.



Submitted April 10, 2021 at 11:50PM

I first hooked up with my fwb in high school. I was 16 he was 18. We've hooked up on and off for eight years. At 18, I asked for more, but he made it clear he only wanted sex. I'm 23 now he is 26We both agreed that if one of us started seeing someone else, we would tell each other, or if one of us was no longer into the FWB situation we would tell each other. He’s very respectful (or was) about this. So all this started in April. I went there last Friday (July 27) and we hooked up and as per usual I left right after. Normally we hook up minimum 2-3x a week plus a lot of sexting. It’s also normal for the texting to slow over the weekend but pick back up literally 7 AM Monday. Well the Monday came and nothing. Tuesday and nothing. Finally I messaged him Wednesday and asked if I could come by for a D session. His reply was “can’t. Busy.” If he’s busy he normally would go off on what he’s busy about. So I said “Oh ok. Haven’t heard from you in a bit. Are you still interested in this?” His response. “My work is very interesting thanks. Some of us aren’t off for the month.” FYI I have a month worth of vacation so I took it all at once but in reality I’m going in for surgery shortly so that’s why I took it off for recovery. So I said “Don’t judge what you don’t know. I’m just asking if you are into this still.” His response “Why? Because I’m busy? We just fcked Friday.” So I said “I’m aware we fcked Friday but normally we would still be hooking up or at least chatting. I’m just asking because what we agreed on is if one of us started dating someone or just wasn’t feeling it anymore we would tell each other.” He said “Haha okay sunshine.” End of conversation.I went out with my girlfriends last night and we ended up at the same lounge it turns out. Not even 5 mins he was legit darting for the door. I didn’t even notice him there but one of my friends did.What the heck is happening here? I get that it’s probably done. I don’t have a feelings for him but it’s the fact I feel really crappy being rejected even sexually. That’s what’s really bothering me. Plus the fact we agreed to be open and we were. At one point I was seeing someone so I paused the whole thing for a couple weeks. Didn’t work out so we went back to the usual.
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