/u/Thornescape on Clarifying the Sex Repulsed/Favourable vs Sex/Positive/Negative terminology and spectrum

A demisexual functions like an asexual until they form a particular connection with someone, and when they have that particular connection they function like an allosexual with that person with full sexual attraction. "Functions like" is not the same as "is identical to".

This terminology is accurate. Demisexuals see both sides. They aren't identical to either asexual or allosexual, if you really analyze it. If you used the same method to analyze the asexual side of demis, then they wouldn't pass either. Your approach would mean that demisexuals don't count as asexuals either.

Demisexuals function like asexuals most of the time, and under special circumstances, they function like allosexuals with specific people. That's what happens. That's how it is. It doesn't invalidate us in any way to say it.

Demisexuals struggle because stuff doesn't make sense. Demi didn't even exist as a definition until 2007, which was long after I stopped dating. I was just left with confusion because I knew that some very memorable times I functioned like an allosexual, so it never occurred to me that sometimes I was actually asexual. I had no idea why I was reacting the way that I was. It was extremely confusing.





April 16, 2021 at 12:01AM
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