/u/ryukohime on AITA in this conversation? If so how could have better gotten my thoughts across.
I don't think you said or did anything wrong. There's no excuse for cheating, but that also doesn't invalidate her sexuality. I do think your sister is in the wrong here for not really listening you and then turning the argument into a "her vs me" thing, though. But I also understand that your sister is angry; I've had the same feelings towards people that have hurt my loved ones before. That doesn't excuse your sister for invalidating someone's sexuality, either.
Societal pressure is a bitch. I don't know for sure if I'd still be a virgin or not without it, but I do understand the feeling of "I have to do this or Something's Wrong With Me™." Doesn't mean it's right to cheat, or to pressure someone else into having sex. I can also understand why your ex might have felt the need to try it in order to "fit in" or feel validated, but that doesn't mean I excuse her actions or think they're right. There's a difference between understanding and condoning; I understand, but I do not condone.
I hope your sister comes around and realizes that just because your ex is a shitty person doesn't mean it's okay to invalidate her identity. Terrible person or not, she's still a person and does deserve some basic form of respect.
February 04, 2021 at 11:34PM
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