Reconnecting with a past OLD

Backstory: Moved to a new city pre-covid, wasn't able to meet new friends prior to the pandemic, broke up with my long-term girlfriend, super cautious about the virus, so had no local friends and limited hobbies, then finally got back into dating.

OLD: A few months back, I made a connection with through OLD. It felt like we immediately hit things off and met up shortly after. We went on 3 great dates over the course of a week and had some amazing chemistry. It felt like we had a lot in common and could talk about anything. We had planned a forth date, but she ended up cancelling, saying that as much as she wished she was into me, she just wasn't feeling it. My gut feeling is I came off too available (having no friends and limited hobbies in my new city) and that's why she ended things. We exchanged a few really nice/meaningful goodbye texts and haven't been in contact since.

Fast forward to now, I've put a lot of effort into expanding my network in my new city, have new friends, picked up a few new hobbies, and have gone on multiple other dates. Being in my 30s, I've gone on plenty of dates that didn't work out. Although disappointed, I've always had this "hindsight clarity" where I've come to realize as much as I enjoyed the date(s) the chemistry just wasn't there; that just isn't the case with the woman and have been thinking about her a lot.

I've read plenty of similar posts, where people suggest there isn't anything to loose by reaching out. I guess my hesitation comes from both not wanting to be rejected, but also don't want to "cheapen" our goodbye (as silly as that sounds).

Would love to hear some advice / feedback as I'm not sure what to do.



Submitted October 04, 2020 at 10:33PM

Backstory: Moved to a new city pre-covid, wasn't able to meet new friends prior to the pandemic, broke up with my long-term girlfriend, super cautious about the virus, so had no local friends and limited hobbies, then finally got back into dating.OLD: A few months back, I made a connection with through OLD. It felt like we immediately hit things off and met up shortly after. We went on 3 great dates over the course of a week and had some amazing chemistry. It felt like we had a lot in common and could talk about anything. We had planned a forth date, but she ended up cancelling, saying that as much as she wished she was into me, she just wasn't feeling it. My gut feeling is I came off too available (having no friends and limited hobbies in my new city) and that's why she ended things. We exchanged a few really nice/meaningful goodbye texts and haven't been in contact since.Fast forward to now, I've put a lot of effort into expanding my network in my new city, have new friends, picked up a few new hobbies, and have gone on multiple other dates. Being in my 30s, I've gone on plenty of dates that didn't work out. Although disappointed, I've always had this "hindsight clarity" where I've come to realize as much as I enjoyed the date(s) the chemistry just wasn't there; that just isn't the case with the woman and have been thinking about her a lot.I've read plenty of similar posts, where people suggest there isn't anything to loose by reaching out. I guess my hesitation comes from both not wanting to be rejected, but also don't want to "cheapen" our goodbye (as silly as that sounds).Would love to hear some advice / feedback as I'm not sure what to do.
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