Clashing with husband over things related to my daughter

Hello everyone,

I got married on Valentine's Day 2020. It's my first marriage. When I was 22 I got pregnant by my college boyfriend. He died in an accident when I was five months pregnant. I was devastated and I'm still not completely over his death.

I had my daughter, focused on finishing college and starting my nursing career. For a long time I didn't date. I started dating five years ago and eventually met my husband. He doesn't have kids. He loves my daughter and my daughter loves him.

There's been adjusting to different things for all of us. My daughter and I are very close and she has a best friend who she she has known since pre-school. I sort of consider her best friend like a daughter. I've taken them on trips for several years now.

My husband and I decided to started planning a possible trip to Disney World next year in the spring depending on how things go with covid. Two years ago, I took my daughter's best friend with us and on a Disneyland trip. My daughter and I would love to take her with us on the Disney World trip. However, my husband is against it because we would have to foot most of the bill for my daughter's friend. Her parents have some financial struggles as one of her parents is disabled. I've explained to my husband that view my daughter's friend like a family member, but he disagrees and keeps telling me that I shouldn't be close to the friend because friends sometimes come and go out of our lives.

I know and understand that he should have equal say in decisions. It's difficult to adjust to this new normal.

He has some issues with me being close with my daughter's paternal grandparents. They are kind people and gave me a lot of financial support when I first had my daughter and was finishing up nursing school. My husband seems to be better understanding of that than the relationship with my daughter's friend.

My daughter is upset that we may not be able to take her friend with us if we go on that trip next spring. Again, I know that I have to teach my daughter about compromises in life and that she has to be respectful of her stepfather, but it's just hard to get used to especially since I wasn't married or in a relationship for a long time.



Submitted September 26, 2020 at 11:43PM

Hello everyone,I got married on Valentine's Day 2020. It's my first marriage. When I was 22 I got pregnant by my college boyfriend. He died in an accident when I was five months pregnant. I was devastated and I'm still not completely over his death.I had my daughter, focused on finishing college and starting my nursing career. For a long time I didn't date. I started dating five years ago and eventually met my husband. He doesn't have kids. He loves my daughter and my daughter loves him.There's been adjusting to different things for all of us. My daughter and I are very close and she has a best friend who she she has known since pre-school. I sort of consider her best friend like a daughter. I've taken them on trips for several years now.My husband and I decided to started planning a possible trip to Disney World next year in the spring depending on how things go with covid. Two years ago, I took my daughter's best friend with us and on a Disneyland trip. My daughter and I would love to take her with us on the Disney World trip. However, my husband is against it because we would have to foot most of the bill for my daughter's friend. Her parents have some financial struggles as one of her parents is disabled. I've explained to my husband that view my daughter's friend like a family member, but he disagrees and keeps telling me that I shouldn't be close to the friend because friends sometimes come and go out of our lives.I know and understand that he should have equal say in decisions. It's difficult to adjust to this new normal.He has some issues with me being close with my daughter's paternal grandparents. They are kind people and gave me a lot of financial support when I first had my daughter and was finishing up nursing school. My husband seems to be better understanding of that than the relationship with my daughter's friend.My daughter is upset that we may not be able to take her friend with us if we go on that trip next spring. Again, I know that I have to teach my daughter about compromises in life and that she has to be respectful of her stepfather, but it's just hard to get used to especially since I wasn't married or in a relationship for a long time.
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