/u/Misterwuss on Increased ‘attraction’ due to not spending time with friends?

I mean sorta? Due to quarenteen I've been "questioning" if you can really call it that. Basically I have this weird habit (which my friend informs me is a type of anxiety?) where if I get a thought in my head, even one I know ain't true or real, it never leaves me until something takes its place. I had one intrusive thought about sex which honestly almost made me throw up and now my brain won't let go of it. Constant anxiety running through my brain like "Do you know you as well as you think you do?" And "But what if..." and with very little to do in lock-up these thoughts have nothing to be replaced with and have been plaguing my brain for a solid month or two. Because it wasn't just a normal intrusive thought either, I was having a text convo with a friend (Who doesn't know I'm ace, she didn't do this to spite me) and she mentioned about a smut book about (Sorry for the NSFW detail all you fellow sex-repulsed out there) a threesome, she found in the science section of a library one time (obviously put there for a joke) and then it came into my mind about an hour after the convo ended, for not even half a minute, made me queasy, and yet my brain was still like "You were thinking about sex! You- you thought about sex! Did you like it? Are you sure you didn't? Are you just hiding you did like it?!" And "There was both a lass and a dude in that thought, you were thinking of both, does this mean something? Are you sure it doesn't? You aren't around anyone so you never know" and it's the most annoying crap. Like, I know who I am but anxiety about "Am I who I think I am" doesn't just say otherwise, it's like that naggy friend who won't let small details go.

So my TL:DR: Intrusive thoughts and anxiety suck, they especially suck together, you're not alone pal, Can't wait for lock-up to end





July 09, 2020 at 11:54PM
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