My Dating Data: An Experiment in Tracking

I'm starting to keep track of my dating data... I thought maybe it would be useful if we start bringing to light our patterns and OLD "norms" by tracking our experiences instead of keeping it in our heads like some anecdote. I understand this is a totally biased data set. I hope that it can bring others the sense of shared experience and not to give up or enlightens someone about what other's experience.

Personally, I hope this helps me to be more concise moving forward. My goal is to end things sooner and stop being a pushover. When I see the numbers below it shows me that I waste a lot of time on people who don't deserve that time. I should not be investing in men who do not invest in me. Furthermore, not every pan will contain gold. There are a lot of people out there and OLD apps make it easier for me to see more. That also means there are a lot of just rocks and fool's gold mixed in that can confuse me or be exhausting if I let it get to me. I sincerely hope that tracking my dating moving forward will help me glean insight and move toward a successful relationship.

Since March 1 I have matched with around 250 men. 150 of them had at least one exchange that could be deemed a conversation.

Moved to text: 15

First date: 6 (pre-pandemic 5; post-pandemic 1)

Second date: 2

Virtual dates: 2

Detail of what happened with those who moved to text:

1 has no interest in talking until quarantine is over

2-3 no chemistry irl

4 only was able to participate in small talk

5 was a pervert

6 had too different of a lifestyle

7 every conversation had to be so deep and meaningful that it was overwhelming

8 told me he wasn't a good guy so I listened

9 sent me an unsolicited dick pic after a date...he still occasionally messages me and gets really mad easily when I don't want to go out. I should probably block him. He also lied about a text he sent me...he claims he didn't send it when it's literally on my phone. Weird!

10 texts too much, then will send a few snaps, then DM me on insta and then will say he feels like I'm not interested because in the 20 minute span he did all this (during the work day mind you) I didn't respond

11 sent me a text at 1am asking if I was "out and about"

12-14 the conversation was so boring that I don't even remember why it faded out, I'm even reviewing the texts now and it's just 🤷🏻‍♀️

15 I really like and he's really sweet. I could go in-depth on what he does that is attractive to me but that's all subjective. He is definitely not my usual type, physically but I really like him. Things kind of fizzled. We went on a few virtual dates. Eventually we went to the park. It didn't really feel like he was investing in me. So I stopped investing in him. Eventually, I just said I didn't feel like it was going anywhere and he told me he had been meaning to talk to me. He felt like between friends, family, and hobbies he didn't have time to date.

Currently, I'm back at it! I'm talking to two guys on a dating app. However, I don't add them to my data until it goes "off app". Best of luck to everyone navigating this crazy culture of dating. <3

Submitted May 26, 2020 at 11:48PM

I'm starting to keep track of my dating data... I thought maybe it would be useful if we start bringing to light our patterns and OLD "norms" by tracking our experiences instead of keeping it in our heads like some anecdote. I understand this is a totally biased data set. I hope that it can bring others the sense of shared experience and not to give up or enlightens someone about what other's experience.Personally, I hope this helps me to be more concise moving forward. My goal is to end things sooner and stop being a pushover. When I see the numbers below it shows me that I waste a lot of time on people who don't deserve that time. I should not be investing in men who do not invest in me. Furthermore, not every pan will contain gold. There are a lot of people out there and OLD apps make it easier for me to see more. That also means there are a lot of just rocks and fool's gold mixed in that can confuse me or be exhausting if I let it get to me. I sincerely hope that tracking my dating moving forward will help me glean insight and move toward a successful relationship.Since March 1 I have matched with around 250 men. 150 of them had at least one exchange that could be deemed a conversation.Moved to text: 15First date: 6 (pre-pandemic 5; post-pandemic 1)Second date: 2Virtual dates: 2Detail of what happened with those who moved to text:1 has no interest in talking until quarantine is over2-3 no chemistry irl4 only was able to participate in small talk5 was a pervert6 had too different of a lifestyle7 every conversation had to be so deep and meaningful that it was overwhelming8 told me he wasn't a good guy so I listened9 sent me an unsolicited dick pic after a date...he still occasionally messages me and gets really mad easily when I don't want to go out. I should probably block him. He also lied about a text he sent me...he claims he didn't send it when it's literally on my phone. Weird!10 texts too much, then will send a few snaps, then DM me on insta and then will say he feels like I'm not interested because in the 20 minute span he did all this (during the work day mind you) I didn't respond11 sent me a text at 1am asking if I was "out and about"12-14 the conversation was so boring that I don't even remember why it faded out, I'm even reviewing the texts now and it's just 🤷🏻‍♀️15 I really like and he's really sweet. I could go in-depth on what he does that is attractive to me but that's all subjective. He is definitely not my usual type, physically but I really like him. Things kind of fizzled. We went on a few virtual dates. Eventually we went to the park. It didn't really feel like he was investing in me. So I stopped investing in him. Eventually, I just said I didn't feel like it was going anywhere and he told me he had been meaning to talk to me. He felt like between friends, family, and hobbies he didn't have time to date.Currently, I'm back at it! I'm talking to two guys on a dating app. However, I don't add them to my data until it goes "off app". Best of luck to everyone navigating this crazy culture of dating. <3