really fucked up situation w my crush and i have no idea what i should do from now on. everything feels shitty

this guy has liked me for a long long time, at first i didnt reciprocate his attention bc i didnt think he liked me at all. but after about six months of him trying i finally paid him attention bc i finally understood that he liked me...

we ended up talking over social media where he said a lot of sweet things that kinda mean hes into dating me. eventually i invited him over and we slept together, it was a good time. but he snuck out of the house while i was asleep and i told him in the morning that he could have told me that he couldnt stay and i would have walked him to the door. (I find sneaking out so unnecessary) after that i reached out multiple times trying to see if we could hangout again and he told me "soon i promise" "Its worth the wait!" (but much nicer and cuter than that)

flash forward to yesterday where we had a staff party (he used to work for them but doesnt anymore thats how i met him) anyway the minute i walked in and sat down with my roommates he came and sat next to me and was being really awkward the whole time, i tried making conversation with him but he was being short with me and not really responding much. i sensed that he felt awkward and nervous. another one of my male coworkers whose been trying to flirt w me kinda approached and gave me this face and looked me up and down and i literally made an ew face, he saw him do that and saw my reaction and was like "calm down" and i was like what the... maybe he felt jealous. and in general he was feeling really nervous bc he was being so awkward and quiet around me and my roomies. he wouldnt even join the conversation he was just eating his food and drinking his drink and making a comment here and there. i would really try to talk with him but he was so awkward.

another one of my coworkers came in and sat down with us at the table, she started to make fun of him for the girls he slept with infront of me and i could see he didnt want her to talk about that infront of me. he kept telling her to shut up and stuff and to stop bringing that stuff up but she had no clue about me and him and kept going.

he got up and left the table and sat at another table next to another girl. maybe bc he was feeling so awkward at our table and nervous around me he couldnt handle it so he went to hangout with someone he felt comfortable and confident with. at that point, my roomies wanted smokes so we got up and left to the corner store. when we got back he was walking out w a bunch of girls and they went to smoke up (weed). he and that girl he was sitting next to stayed behind while the rest came back earlier. when he got back i was in the lobby and this other coworker approached me and he was talking to me and hugging me. at that point i saw my crush grab the girls hand and hold it and walk past me. i was like???????

when i went back inside ... he was with her at the bar... then he sat at my table again w/o her. i approached and asked if he was high. he said yes. i told him "you went to smoke weed and you didnt invite me?" cos he knows i smoke too and i was just probing him like what the fuck... he didnt really say anything he got quiet and kinda got up and left after a few seconds. i think bc he felt awkward and guilty cos i was calling him out.

i went back out to the lobby at one point where i saw him and he took my hand and said "im so drunk i had so much to drink" and walked away. he couldnt handle talking to me anymore than that i guess. probs cos he felt super duper awkward now that he clearly was flirting w another girl infront of me after telling me so many times that he liked me...

the night went on and things get blurry here. i was standing outside w him and my coworkers talking all of us and he whispered in this girls ear and she put her hands around him. i walked away. came back a few minutes later... it felt so awful. i hated watching this. that same coworker that approached me in the lobby and hugged me came up again and said hey. i hey'd back and squeezed past my crush to get away and he saw me do that and literally put himself between us and got his attention and talked to him as if to help me out. fucker.

after he saw me reject that guy i suppose he was feeling a little better and started hugging our manager after the coworker left the group. couple of us walked into another room and he and i were kinda left behind in it for a bit and we talked a little. its blurry, idk what we talked about, i was pretty drunk.

after that, at one point i was outside in the lobby and the girl he was flirting with came up to me and was like talking about him. i told her that we slept together. she was like i wont do that to you, i wont go for it. i was like do whatever you want its okay dont even worry about me.

things went on, drinking more, hed say passing words to me couple times, it was terrible, then i was in the bathroom w my coworkers and he opened the door and asked to talk to me. i went w him and he asked me who i had told about him and i bc hes hearing ppl talk about us saying we slept together. i lied and said i didnt tell anyone, he was like "thats all i wanted to hear" and walked away... probably that girl said she wouldnt go with him bc she knew that i slept w him and thats why he was butthurt.

i went back in the bathroom and apparently at this time he was in the room sitting and looking depressed, my roomies went up to talk to him and asked him why hes so upset. he said a lot, that hes so drunk, that hes interested in a girl but cant have her cos she knows about me and him, that he didnt expect that to happen and stuff, that he doesnt know why ppl know about us etc, that girls are always after his money, that hes been hurt before pretty badly and hes given up on relationships, saying how insecure he is and stuff. my roomies called him out and said like everyones insecure, everyones been hurt before, and what did he expect, of course ppl talk...... also told him that its not about money, its about yourself as a person, told him not to flaunt the money and stuff, that theres girls out there that dont care about that stuff. told him that if he wants to just fuck around then he should be on tinder not fucking up girls at work.

he said "you guys are right" and stuff. and thats all that happened, he left, i left. havent talked to him since and now im so confused what the hell happened there and what i should do... im so hurt. i really liked him... what the hell man. why did he act so nice why did he sit w me at first and then GIVE UP and go after someone else INFRONT OF ME???? why did he say so many things that made me feel like he actually liked me and cared about me and wanted to see me??? why did he end up flirting w another girl. why couldnt he have flirted w me??? i know he was planning on it bc he was sitting w me but he was being so FUCKING awkward that i coudlnt even talk to him at all then got embarassed and fucking LEFT cos hes SO INSECURE like ? fucker.

what do i do. sometimes he comes into my work, and like, i dont even know what i should feel. i was thinking to text him something and tell him that i liked him and that he hurt me but idk if thats right. what should i do... what should i do?

Submitted February 13, 2020 at 11:31PM

this guy has liked me for a long long time, at first i didnt reciprocate his attention bc i didnt think he liked me at all. but after about six months of him trying i finally paid him attention bc i finally understood that he liked me...we ended up talking over social media where he said a lot of sweet things that kinda mean hes into dating me. eventually i invited him over and we slept together, it was a good time. but he snuck out of the house while i was asleep and i told him in the morning that he could have told me that he couldnt stay and i would have walked him to the door. (I find sneaking out so unnecessary) after that i reached out multiple times trying to see if we could hangout again and he told me "soon i promise" "Its worth the wait!" (but much nicer and cuter than that)flash forward to yesterday where we had a staff party (he used to work for them but doesnt anymore thats how i met him) anyway the minute i walked in and sat down with my roommates he came and sat next to me and was being really awkward the whole time, i tried making conversation with him but he was being short with me and not really responding much. i sensed that he felt awkward and nervous. another one of my male coworkers whose been trying to flirt w me kinda approached and gave me this face and looked me up and down and i literally made an ew face, he saw him do that and saw my reaction and was like "calm down" and i was like what the... maybe he felt jealous. and in general he was feeling really nervous bc he was being so awkward and quiet around me and my roomies. he wouldnt even join the conversation he was just eating his food and drinking his drink and making a comment here and there. i would really try to talk with him but he was so awkward.another one of my coworkers came in and sat down with us at the table, she started to make fun of him for the girls he slept with infront of me and i could see he didnt want her to talk about that infront of me. he kept telling her to shut up and stuff and to stop bringing that stuff up but she had no clue about me and him and kept going.he got up and left the table and sat at another table next to another girl. maybe bc he was feeling so awkward at our table and nervous around me he couldnt handle it so he went to hangout with someone he felt comfortable and confident with. at that point, my roomies wanted smokes so we got up and left to the corner store. when we got back he was walking out w a bunch of girls and they went to smoke up (weed). he and that girl he was sitting next to stayed behind while the rest came back earlier. when he got back i was in the lobby and this other coworker approached me and he was talking to me and hugging me. at that point i saw my crush grab the girls hand and hold it and walk past me. i was like???????when i went back inside ... he was with her at the bar... then he sat at my table again w/o her. i approached and asked if he was high. he said yes. i told him "you went to smoke weed and you didnt invite me?" cos he knows i smoke too and i was just probing him like what the fuck... he didnt really say anything he got quiet and kinda got up and left after a few seconds. i think bc he felt awkward and guilty cos i was calling him out.i went back out to the lobby at one point where i saw him and he took my hand and said "im so drunk i had so much to drink" and walked away. he couldnt handle talking to me anymore than that i guess. probs cos he felt super duper awkward now that he clearly was flirting w another girl infront of me after telling me so many times that he liked me...the night went on and things get blurry here. i was standing outside w him and my coworkers talking all of us and he whispered in this girls ear and she put her hands around him. i walked away. came back a few minutes later... it felt so awful. i hated watching this. that same coworker that approached me in the lobby and hugged me came up again and said hey. i hey'd back and squeezed past my crush to get away and he saw me do that and literally put himself between us and got his attention and talked to him as if to help me out. fucker.after he saw me reject that guy i suppose he was feeling a little better and started hugging our manager after the coworker left the group. couple of us walked into another room and he and i were kinda left behind in it for a bit and we talked a little. its blurry, idk what we talked about, i was pretty drunk.after that, at one point i was outside in the lobby and the girl he was flirting with came up to me and was like talking about him. i told her that we slept together. she was like i wont do that to you, i wont go for it. i was like do whatever you want its okay dont even worry about me.things went on, drinking more, hed say passing words to me couple times, it was terrible, then i was in the bathroom w my coworkers and he opened the door and asked to talk to me. i went w him and he asked me who i had told about him and i bc hes hearing ppl talk about us saying we slept together. i lied and said i didnt tell anyone, he was like "thats all i wanted to hear" and walked away... probably that girl said she wouldnt go with him bc she knew that i slept w him and thats why he was butthurt.i went back in the bathroom and apparently at this time he was in the room sitting and looking depressed, my roomies went up to talk to him and asked him why hes so upset. he said a lot, that hes so drunk, that hes interested in a girl but cant have her cos she knows about me and him, that he didnt expect that to happen and stuff, that he doesnt know why ppl know about us etc, that girls are always after his money, that hes been hurt before pretty badly and hes given up on relationships, saying how insecure he is and stuff. my roomies called him out and said like everyones insecure, everyones been hurt before, and what did he expect, of course ppl talk...... also told him that its not about money, its about yourself as a person, told him not to flaunt the money and stuff, that theres girls out there that dont care about that stuff. told him that if he wants to just fuck around then he should be on tinder not fucking up girls at work.he said "you guys are right" and stuff. and thats all that happened, he left, i left. havent talked to him since and now im so confused what the hell happened there and what i should do... im so hurt. i really liked him... what the hell man. why did he act so nice why did he sit w me at first and then GIVE UP and go after someone else INFRONT OF ME???? why did he say so many things that made me feel like he actually liked me and cared about me and wanted to see me??? why did he end up flirting w another girl. why couldnt he have flirted w me??? i know he was planning on it bc he was sitting w me but he was being so FUCKING awkward that i coudlnt even talk to him at all then got embarassed and fucking LEFT cos hes SO INSECURE like ? fucker.what do i do. sometimes he comes into my work, and like, i dont even know what i should feel. i was thinking to text him something and tell him that i liked him and that he hurt me but idk if thats right. what should i do... what should i do?