Moment of dyslexia

So, I got out for prison in December after 3.5 years. It was awesome getting out, I’ve achieved many of my small goals since getting out: working full time, saving a bunch, getting a gym membership, going to meetings, and doing stand up comedy whenever I can. The one thing I have yet to accomplish? Having sex/finding a girl. Needless to say, it’s a problem but also one I’m not sure I should even focus on. Relationship can cause problems, especially when I’m just getting my shit together. Also, a month after I was sentenced my girlfriend of 3 years passed away, so that was sad. BUT I shaved my bush after waiting four years and it needs to be appreciated!!

I was at a pub waiting to do a set, and met this really cool girl. She’s pretty, funny, and we got along super well. And she was there to do her second set ever, which is pretty cool. I was hesitant to do my jokes about prison because I thought it would immediately blow my chances of ever hanging out with her again, whether that be as friends or more, whatever. But I decided I can’t hide who I am and did my set full of jokes about my experience of going to prison. It went fine, my expectations are low at this point and I got laughs so I was cool with that.

I waited for her to go up before heading home, she was funny, and did a good job. I wasn’t sure if my set would scare her away, but it didn’t seem to, she wasn’t acting any differently than before, which is refreshing because people have issues with prison, even if I was in there for some white collar money laundering, people still have barriers up when they find out. Been dealing with that a lot on dating apps. I match with girl and either waste time talking until I break the news of my past or tell them immediately and deal with it then. It definitely impacts my odds considerably. Anyways, I wrote my number down on a piece of paper and told her I was heading out but I wanted to give her my number, and she said something along the lines of “woah! I was just going to say the same thing!” It was loud in there but that’s what she was saying. So I give her the piece of paper with my # on it. When writing my number I had a weird feeling about the very last digit, felt wrong but I’ve had this number for about 6 months and figured “nah you you wouldn’t it write it down wrong”, but I KNOW I put a 6 instead of a 9. I didn’t realize till I got home what I did when replaying the night in my head and confirmed my fears by checking my phone number. Worst part is I didn’t get her number. I will never make that mistake again. Now she probably thinks I’m an asshole.

My only solace is these two facts: there’s a good chance she may not have even texted me, so why be concerned over some possible future? and the other is that I may see her again. If she continues to do stand up then hopefully I’ll see her around and will laugh about the fuck up.

Oh, and I tried texting the wrong phone number I wrote down, explaining the situation and asking the owner of that number to pass on my phone number if they get a random text. The number doesn’t exist and the text bounced back.

Also, I don’t know how to spell her name, it was an Indian name and to be honest I’m not sure I heard it correctly. I tried variations of it on instagram but it’s useless.

Any of you ever had something like this happen? I’ve thought about this non-stop for the last two days because I’m mad at how stupid I have the capacity to be (which is evident by the previously mentioned prison sentence). Any advice how I should approach my prison experience with girls in the future? Best to tell them straight out? or let them get to know me a bit and realize I’m not some thug before breaking the news?

TL;DR

Just got out of prison 6 months ago, been 4 years since I’ve been with a girl in any capacity, shaved my four year old bush and finally meet a funny, cool girl waiting to do stand up. She’s an aspiring comedian too. We hit it off and I accidentally wrote my phone number down wrong, she probably thinks I’m an asshole now. How do I tell girls about my prison experience without scaring them?

Submitted May 27, 2023 at 01:12AM

So, I got out for prison in December after 3.5 years. It was awesome getting out, I’ve achieved many of my small goals since getting out: working full time, saving a bunch, getting a gym membership, going to meetings, and doing stand up comedy whenever I can. The one thing I have yet to accomplish? Having sex/finding a girl. Needless to say, it’s a problem but also one I’m not sure I should even focus on. Relationship can cause problems, especially when I’m just getting my shit together. Also, a month after I was sentenced my girlfriend of 3 years passed away, so that was sad. BUT I shaved my bush after waiting four years and it needs to be appreciated!! I was at a pub waiting to do a set, and met this really cool girl. She’s pretty, funny, and we got along super well. And she was there to do her second set ever, which is pretty cool. I was hesitant to do my jokes about prison because I thought it would immediately blow my chances of ever hanging out with her again, whether that be as friends or more, whatever. But I decided I can’t hide who I am and did my set full of jokes about my experience of going to prison. It went fine, my expectations are low at this point and I got laughs so I was cool with that.I waited for her to go up before heading home, she was funny, and did a good job. I wasn’t sure if my set would scare her away, but it didn’t seem to, she wasn’t acting any differently than before, which is refreshing because people have issues with prison, even if I was in there for some white collar money laundering, people still have barriers up when they find out. Been dealing with that a lot on dating apps. I match with girl and either waste time talking until I break the news of my past or tell them immediately and deal with it then. It definitely impacts my odds considerably. Anyways, I wrote my number down on a piece of paper and told her I was heading out but I wanted to give her my number, and she said something along the lines of “woah! I was just going to say the same thing!” It was loud in there but that’s what she was saying. So I give her the piece of paper with my # on it. When writing my number I had a weird feeling about the very last digit, felt wrong but I’ve had this number for about 6 months and figured “nah you you wouldn’t it write it down wrong”, but I KNOW I put a 6 instead of a 9. I didn’t realize till I got home what I did when replaying the night in my head and confirmed my fears by checking my phone number. Worst part is I didn’t get her number. I will never make that mistake again. Now she probably thinks I’m an asshole.My only solace is these two facts: there’s a good chance she may not have even texted me, so why be concerned over some possible future? and the other is that I may see her again. If she continues to do stand up then hopefully I’ll see her around and will laugh about the fuck up. Oh, and I tried texting the wrong phone number I wrote down, explaining the situation and asking the owner of that number to pass on my phone number if they get a random text. The number doesn’t exist and the text bounced back. Also, I don’t know how to spell her name, it was an Indian name and to be honest I’m not sure I heard it correctly. I tried variations of it on instagram but it’s useless. Any of you ever had something like this happen? I’ve thought about this non-stop for the last two days because I’m mad at how stupid I have the capacity to be (which is evident by the previously mentioned prison sentence). Any advice how I should approach my prison experience with girls in the future? Best to tell them straight out? or let them get to know me a bit and realize I’m not some thug before breaking the news?TL;DRJust got out of prison 6 months ago, been 4 years since I’ve been with a girl in any capacity, shaved my four year old bush and finally meet a funny, cool girl waiting to do stand up. She’s an aspiring comedian too. We hit it off and I accidentally wrote my phone number down wrong, she probably thinks I’m an asshole now. How do I tell girls about my prison experience without scaring them?