shy housemate I’m dating doesn’t make a first move

Me (21F) and my housemate (21M) have been going on four dates together within a week and he hasn’t made a move. For context he is really, very shy. I also don’t think he’s every been intimate with a girl, although I might be wrong about this. I told him I really liked him on a drunk night out and we basically told each other how we felt then. At first everything was slow and he clearly held back a lot of things he wanted to say. Slowly but surely he has been opening up a lot and he tells me how happy he is getting to know me, how much he likes me and continues to ask me out on dates. I feel like we’ve become a lot closer, and I’m starting to feel emotionally attached to this guy. We share a lot of intimate conversations.

Nonetheless, he hasn’t made a move and during all this time (considering we also live together) he hasn’t tried to hug, kiss or be physically intimate at ALL. I struggle to do so as well, but I feel like I try to get him to become more comfortable with me while he is slightly more passive. I sometimes question him, and I have been direct about it. He always tells me he’s bad at communicating and that I should trust him when he says he likes me. He’s invited me out to dinner on valentine’s day and I feel as though it’s really time to take a step forward.

How should I make a move on this guy? Is my situation normal? Should I be worried? Should I avoid getting emotionally attached? I feel like I’m overanalyzing but it’s making me feel insecure :) if anyone has insight would be much appreciated



Submitted February 06, 2023 at 12:11AM

Me (21F) and my housemate (21M) have been going on four dates together within a week and he hasn’t made a move. For context he is really, very shy. I also don’t think he’s every been intimate with a girl, although I might be wrong about this. I told him I really liked him on a drunk night out and we basically told each other how we felt then. At first everything was slow and he clearly held back a lot of things he wanted to say. Slowly but surely he has been opening up a lot and he tells me how happy he is getting to know me, how much he likes me and continues to ask me out on dates. I feel like we’ve become a lot closer, and I’m starting to feel emotionally attached to this guy. We share a lot of intimate conversations.Nonetheless, he hasn’t made a move and during all this time (considering we also live together) he hasn’t tried to hug, kiss or be physically intimate at ALL. I struggle to do so as well, but I feel like I try to get him to become more comfortable with me while he is slightly more passive. I sometimes question him, and I have been direct about it. He always tells me he’s bad at communicating and that I should trust him when he says he likes me. He’s invited me out to dinner on valentine’s day and I feel as though it’s really time to take a step forward.How should I make a move on this guy? Is my situation normal? Should I be worried? Should I avoid getting emotionally attached? I feel like I’m overanalyzing but it’s making me feel insecure :) if anyone has insight would be much appreciated

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