Give me questions or phrases that I (19f) can say to him (19m) to get him to tell me how he really feels about me

I’m dating this guy, I’m really into him

But he’s so frustrating to date. I can’t tell where I stand with him. Like I can’t tell if he’s really into me or if he’s just going out with me out of like pity or because I asked him out first. Here are the facts:

Why I think he’s not into me / just going out with me out of pity 1. I approached him, asked him out to dinner and he said yes (in person) 2. He’s shy. He’s nice. Maybe he doesn’t like approaching girls so when one approaches him he’ll go along with it 3. I just asked him a question; not even a small talk question, an important “are you going to this event” question, and he ignored it (read it and did not respond) 4. His replies aren’t as enthusiastic as my other male friend’s 5. I told him the last time we went on a date he could decide where we go to next. He’s not said anything about our next date 6. He’s not mentioned sex or anything (hes v inexperienced)

Why I think he likes me 1. He initiated our first kiss (but was drunk) 2. He compliments my appearance 3. I could tell he maybe liked me before I asked him out (for a specific, identifiable reason) 4. The ratio of him asking me out to me asking him out is 3:3, so he has asked me out 5. His friends say he’s really into me 6. Our first date was a major success; he even told me himself

This is becoming an issue for me because Im really trying to show him I like him (because I get that he’s super shy and I sometimes come across like I don’t like someone when I do) but I really feel so exposed and I’m so uncomfortable these days (I know that’s a problem on my end) because I told him once that I was really into him, and I keep replying to him quickly

I know I sound ridiculous but years of romcoms and sitcoms have taught me that if he doesn’t hang off a ferris wheel after relentlessly pursuing me then he’s just not that into me

So here is my request, Reddit. I’m seeing him tomorrow (I asked him to meet). Please could you give me some NON SERIOUS questions to ask him so I can gauge if he’s really into me

Because asking him “do u actually like me” isn’t either of our styles, and asking “why haven’t you asked me out yet” is obviously a major red flag

PS: ok I just read that back and I know I sound like an insecure psychopath but you don’t have much in the way of life skills when you’re a 19 year old, why do you think I’m on Reddit

Submitted November 09, 2022 at 12:08AM

I’m dating this guy, I’m really into himBut he’s so frustrating to date. I can’t tell where I stand with him. Like I can’t tell if he’s really into me or if he’s just going out with me out of like pity or because I asked him out first. Here are the facts:Why I think he’s not into me / just going out with me out of pity 1. I approached him, asked him out to dinner and he said yes (in person) 2. He’s shy. He’s nice. Maybe he doesn’t like approaching girls so when one approaches him he’ll go along with it 3. I just asked him a question; not even a small talk question, an important “are you going to this event” question, and he ignored it (read it and did not respond) 4. His replies aren’t as enthusiastic as my other male friend’s 5. I told him the last time we went on a date he could decide where we go to next. He’s not said anything about our next date 6. He’s not mentioned sex or anything (hes v inexperienced)Why I think he likes me 1. He initiated our first kiss (but was drunk) 2. He compliments my appearance 3. I could tell he maybe liked me before I asked him out (for a specific, identifiable reason) 4. The ratio of him asking me out to me asking him out is 3:3, so he has asked me out 5. His friends say he’s really into me 6. Our first date was a major success; he even told me himselfThis is becoming an issue for me because Im really trying to show him I like him (because I get that he’s super shy and I sometimes come across like I don’t like someone when I do) but I really feel so exposed and I’m so uncomfortable these days (I know that’s a problem on my end) because I told him once that I was really into him, and I keep replying to him quicklyI know I sound ridiculous but years of romcoms and sitcoms have taught me that if he doesn’t hang off a ferris wheel after relentlessly pursuing me then he’s just not that into meSo here is my request, Reddit. I’m seeing him tomorrow (I asked him to meet). Please could you give me some NON SERIOUS questions to ask him so I can gauge if he’s really into meBecause asking him “do u actually like me” isn’t either of our styles, and asking “why haven’t you asked me out yet” is obviously a major red flagPS: ok I just read that back and I know I sound like an insecure psychopath but you don’t have much in the way of life skills when you’re a 19 year old, why do you think I’m on Reddit