How much of a red flag is it that I'm 26 and have never been in a relationship

Without going into too much detail, I used to be in a position where it made sense that I hadn't dated yet. Over the past few years, I've worked on myself and followed a lot of the advice that gets posted around the place, and overall I am in a much better place. I'm proud of how far I've come, but the problem is I'm still a 26 year old guy who hasn't even gotten past holding a woman's hand.

So at the start of this year, that all pays off and I manage to set up a date with a girl who I really liked. First date, things were going well, and the topic of dating came up and I told her I hadn't really dated before. She seemed a little taken aback but nothing too serious, (I kind of expected that anyway) but from that point on she was noticeably quieter. The date ends, it's pretty obvious she doesn't want to hug/kiss or anything so we just part ways. I get a text a bit later on from her saying she's sorry, but she had a bad experience with someone in a similar situation as myself in the past, and didn't want to go further. It kinda sucked to hear, but I understand why she'd feel that way and I told her I understood. I feel a bit down about the whole situation for a little while after that and have probably too much time to dwell on it , but eventually come to terms with the fact this was an outlier and move on.

Fast forward to a few weeks ago and I find another woman who I'm interested enough in to ask out, she says yes, we go out, and the topic of dating comes up again. I tell her, I haven't done much in terms of dating or relationships and things go the same way as last time, only this time I'm told she doesn't want to have to teach someone how to be in a relationship.

I know 2 isn't really much of a sample size, but I'm not the kind of person to just date for the sake of dating. I hadn't really thought not dating before would be that much of a problem, but so far it's not gone well for me. Has this just been bad luck, or is it more of a problem than I thought. I'm starting to worry more because if it is, it's only going to become more of a problem.



Submitted October 03, 2022 at 12:13AM

Without going into too much detail, I used to be in a position where it made sense that I hadn't dated yet. Over the past few years, I've worked on myself and followed a lot of the advice that gets posted around the place, and overall I am in a much better place. I'm proud of how far I've come, but the problem is I'm still a 26 year old guy who hasn't even gotten past holding a woman's hand.So at the start of this year, that all pays off and I manage to set up a date with a girl who I really liked. First date, things were going well, and the topic of dating came up and I told her I hadn't really dated before. She seemed a little taken aback but nothing too serious, (I kind of expected that anyway) but from that point on she was noticeably quieter. The date ends, it's pretty obvious she doesn't want to hug/kiss or anything so we just part ways. I get a text a bit later on from her saying she's sorry, but she had a bad experience with someone in a similar situation as myself in the past, and didn't want to go further. It kinda sucked to hear, but I understand why she'd feel that way and I told her I understood. I feel a bit down about the whole situation for a little while after that and have probably too much time to dwell on it , but eventually come to terms with the fact this was an outlier and move on.Fast forward to a few weeks ago and I find another woman who I'm interested enough in to ask out, she says yes, we go out, and the topic of dating comes up again. I tell her, I haven't done much in terms of dating or relationships and things go the same way as last time, only this time I'm told she doesn't want to have to teach someone how to be in a relationship.I know 2 isn't really much of a sample size, but I'm not the kind of person to just date for the sake of dating. I hadn't really thought not dating before would be that much of a problem, but so far it's not gone well for me. Has this just been bad luck, or is it more of a problem than I thought. I'm starting to worry more because if it is, it's only going to become more of a problem.
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