should I change my likes to be in a relationship?

Hello new here and first time posting. Also currently in mobile sorry for formatting issues. I( f27) have been dating N(M28) for over 4 months. I like N he is a good guy and after the 3rd month of dating I started questioning why we haven't made it official. When friends ask why he always says we are taking things slow and there is no rush. We honestly have good chemistry. My suspicion was that maybe he was concerned about our income difference. He makes way more money than me. I work at a daycare which I love. He never said anything about my job but since our connection is really good that's the only thing I could think of. Well today I heard the real reason why he won't ask me to be his girlfriend. I wasn't feeling very well so I left work early. While driving I felt light headed and since N apartment is closer to my job I decided to rest there before heading home. I have a key and I have done this in the past with Ns permission of course. As I was opening the door I heard him talking to his cousin on the phone. He was making excuses for me not being able to attend his wedding next month. I really didn't expect to be invited since we are just dating and assumed he was going alone. His cousin kept asking why he was scared to bring me around his family; he kept saying he wasn't. Finally he snapped and said "Fine it's because she is weird''. He said he liked me and all but I wouldn't fit with his family since I am a grown up still obsessed with cartoons. I felt my heart sink and closed the door and left to rest in my car. I have been here for a while trying to process what about it makes me undesirable. I like anime because I grew up with it. The first memories of watching TV are episodes of DB. Let me put it this way: while most people in the US grew up with TV shows from Disney and Nickelodeon, I didn't instead I watched Telenovelas and anime. What is also making me feel worse is knowing I did my best to fit in with people around him. I love anime but I also have other interests. I like going on walks and I like playing pool or darts. I am not a club person but I can do it now and then especially if it is a latin club. I like to have a drink after a week of hard work so I'm not antisocial. My first relationship I was dating a guy who was really obsessed with anime. He didn't do anything other than that and he left me because I was not a true fan. Granted if you took a look at me I seem like a girly girl. So when dating online people think I'm just trying to be a "pick me" girl. Dating is hard for me. Most of my first conversations with men don't go too well when we reach the " what is your favorite…" because I have different tastes and I have no clue what pop culture is. I just watched hocus pocus last year to give you an idea how lost I get during conversations sometimes. Whenever people find out I haven't watched something half of the country has, I usually get that I'm uncultured. I do try to watch what people recommend so I am not close-minded. I really want a life partner. Maybe what I'm trying to ask is if I should bury that side of me to fit in and have a good relationship?



Submitted September 28, 2022 at 12:04AM

Hello new here and first time posting. Also currently in mobile sorry for formatting issues. I( f27) have been dating N(M28) for over 4 months. I like N he is a good guy and after the 3rd month of dating I started questioning why we haven't made it official. When friends ask why he always says we are taking things slow and there is no rush. We honestly have good chemistry. My suspicion was that maybe he was concerned about our income difference. He makes way more money than me. I work at a daycare which I love. He never said anything about my job but since our connection is really good that's the only thing I could think of. Well today I heard the real reason why he won't ask me to be his girlfriend. I wasn't feeling very well so I left work early. While driving I felt light headed and since N apartment is closer to my job I decided to rest there before heading home. I have a key and I have done this in the past with Ns permission of course. As I was opening the door I heard him talking to his cousin on the phone. He was making excuses for me not being able to attend his wedding next month. I really didn't expect to be invited since we are just dating and assumed he was going alone. His cousin kept asking why he was scared to bring me around his family; he kept saying he wasn't. Finally he snapped and said "Fine it's because she is weird''. He said he liked me and all but I wouldn't fit with his family since I am a grown up still obsessed with cartoons. I felt my heart sink and closed the door and left to rest in my car. I have been here for a while trying to process what about it makes me undesirable. I like anime because I grew up with it. The first memories of watching TV are episodes of DB. Let me put it this way: while most people in the US grew up with TV shows from Disney and Nickelodeon, I didn't instead I watched Telenovelas and anime. What is also making me feel worse is knowing I did my best to fit in with people around him. I love anime but I also have other interests. I like going on walks and I like playing pool or darts. I am not a club person but I can do it now and then especially if it is a latin club. I like to have a drink after a week of hard work so I'm not antisocial. My first relationship I was dating a guy who was really obsessed with anime. He didn't do anything other than that and he left me because I was not a true fan. Granted if you took a look at me I seem like a girly girl. So when dating online people think I'm just trying to be a "pick me" girl. Dating is hard for me. Most of my first conversations with men don't go too well when we reach the " what is your favorite…" because I have different tastes and I have no clue what pop culture is. I just watched hocus pocus last year to give you an idea how lost I get during conversations sometimes. Whenever people find out I haven't watched something half of the country has, I usually get that I'm uncultured. I do try to watch what people recommend so I am not close-minded. I really want a life partner. Maybe what I'm trying to ask is if I should bury that side of me to fit in and have a good relationship?
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