Was unadding her the wrong move?

I saw this girl for a few months that I met thru a group project in a finance class. It was going pretty well, at least I thought. She told all her friends how much she liked me, how nice I was, and how much she enjoyed spending time with me. She would tell me the same and would say how much she cared about my opinion of her.

Long story short, she started becoming distant for a few weeks. She would never say anything was up, or that she wasn't interested anymore. Even when she would flake (which was because she was busy), sometimes she'd offer another day. Even if she didn't, she'd reiterate that she wasn't trying to be difficult, and that it was just a rough point in the semester. I figured with it being finals season and her being legit the most involved person on campus with work/student gov/faculty senate/sorority/extra-curriculars on top of exams. We were still friendly and had a class together. She would text sometimes, reference when we would hang out, and we even face-timed once.

Eventually I asked her what was up because I felt that vibes were off and she just said, "you seem really nice, but I'm focusing on work rn for just the summer. Would love to stay friends". I just told her good luck and take care this summer. I figured it was in part truthful. She's working in investment banking this summer and it's her dream job, so totally reasonable she'd want to focus on work, especially given the shit work-life balance of IB. But I still unadded her on everything because I had feelings for her and didn't want to see what she was up to in the instance it was a polite rejection.

I basically went NC for my own sake, and haven't reached out since. I spoke to her in person a few times in class and we were friendly. She also reached out twice about around 2/3 weeks after this about random school related stuff, even after the school year ended. Both times she didn't really try to continue the convo beyond 2-3 texts, which was frustrating, but she still was the one who reached out.

It's really a 50/50 she's being honest or it was a polite rejection. So many things that indicate both and conflict each other, tbh. Was unadding her the right move if something were to happen in the fall? Should I reach out in the summer and ask how things are? Worst comes to worse, she doesn't really respond or it stays friendly. It was an amicable parting of ways so there's no bad blood.

Submitted May 31, 2022 at 12:10AM

I saw this girl for a few months that I met thru a group project in a finance class. It was going pretty well, at least I thought. She told all her friends how much she liked me, how nice I was, and how much she enjoyed spending time with me. She would tell me the same and would say how much she cared about my opinion of her.Long story short, she started becoming distant for a few weeks. She would never say anything was up, or that she wasn't interested anymore. Even when she would flake (which was because she was busy), sometimes she'd offer another day. Even if she didn't, she'd reiterate that she wasn't trying to be difficult, and that it was just a rough point in the semester. I figured with it being finals season and her being legit the most involved person on campus with work/student gov/faculty senate/sorority/extra-curriculars on top of exams. We were still friendly and had a class together. She would text sometimes, reference when we would hang out, and we even face-timed once.Eventually I asked her what was up because I felt that vibes were off and she just said, "you seem really nice, but I'm focusing on work rn for just the summer. Would love to stay friends". I just told her good luck and take care this summer. I figured it was in part truthful. She's working in investment banking this summer and it's her dream job, so totally reasonable she'd want to focus on work, especially given the shit work-life balance of IB. But I still unadded her on everything because I had feelings for her and didn't want to see what she was up to in the instance it was a polite rejection.I basically went NC for my own sake, and haven't reached out since. I spoke to her in person a few times in class and we were friendly. She also reached out twice about around 2/3 weeks after this about random school related stuff, even after the school year ended. Both times she didn't really try to continue the convo beyond 2-3 texts, which was frustrating, but she still was the one who reached out.It's really a 50/50 she's being honest or it was a polite rejection. So many things that indicate both and conflict each other, tbh. Was unadding her the right move if something were to happen in the fall? Should I reach out in the summer and ask how things are? Worst comes to worse, she doesn't really respond or it stays friendly. It was an amicable parting of ways so there's no bad blood.