Spoiled brat scared to leave home and get into reality of adult life alone in abroad

I(22F) have never worked in my life, I live in a third world country where there’s no part time job. Since the pandemic hit, I had to stop going to university because my family members are worried about Covid while having members with chronic diseases. Since we don’t need to work and have income from our investments, no one works. I’m very comfortable in this life style but sometimes I feel so useless. I have wanted to settle abroad but I don’t want to work 8 hours daily to barely cover rent. My dad offered some money to help me get a degree in Aus, I am scared to do everything alone. I’ve a bf (21M) (hidden from my family except my brother) my family would be against of because of his religion,we used to date locally but he had to go the states for college. He’d come live with me if I move to Aus but I can’t let my family know. They’d cut me off entirely, I don’t want to stop seeing my family. I don’t want to find out my dad died while we didn’t talk for years. It haunts me even in my dreams. I don’t even care if they cut me off financially if I can live by fine, I just want to keep the peace with them and have them accept my partner as my partner, not as someone they can choose.

I might get a lot of hate for being a spoiled brat, I’m okay with it. I just think about everything going wrong and me ending up wasting my dads money and disappointing them in the end. I feel so sorry and guilty being with my man while I don’t know if I’ll even have the courage to get out and be confident enough to be independent.

He seems to be very worried and a bit impatient. We won’t be able to meet for another 2-3 years even if I can get out.We were both dating to marry but when he went to the states, everything got too big. I do love him genuinely a lot but sometimes feels like I’m dragging him around the maze. He’s not settled either, he’d offer I won’t have to work and just be his wife but I’m not that dumb to rely solely on a man in a new country. He’s not pushy about it, he just sees me being anxious about everything going wrong and assures me he’ll be there to help me in the end so I won’t have to worry.

I know some of you would tell be to “ check reality “ and just push it through and work my ass out. I know how it is, I have to work and all but since I’ve not done any at all, I don’t even know if I’m capable of. Even Sch projects are hard for me. I just said this to show I’m very anxious person and an over-thinker.

I don’t know what I want from this post. Any advice or opinions would be nice.

Tldr; never worked in life, in a ldrs with a guy I used to date locally whose religion my family is strongly against of. Lives in a shitty third world country with daddy’s money, dad offered to let me study abroad to continue my degree but I’m scared because I’ve been a spoiled b my entire life and don’t want to work 9-5 to survive. Help

Submitted May 19, 2022 at 12:14AM

I(22F) have never worked in my life, I live in a third world country where there’s no part time job. Since the pandemic hit, I had to stop going to university because my family members are worried about Covid while having members with chronic diseases. Since we don’t need to work and have income from our investments, no one works. I’m very comfortable in this life style but sometimes I feel so useless. I have wanted to settle abroad but I don’t want to work 8 hours daily to barely cover rent. My dad offered some money to help me get a degree in Aus, I am scared to do everything alone. I’ve a bf (21M) (hidden from my family except my brother) my family would be against of because of his religion,we used to date locally but he had to go the states for college. He’d come live with me if I move to Aus but I can’t let my family know. They’d cut me off entirely, I don’t want to stop seeing my family. I don’t want to find out my dad died while we didn’t talk for years. It haunts me even in my dreams. I don’t even care if they cut me off financially if I can live by fine, I just want to keep the peace with them and have them accept my partner as my partner, not as someone they can choose.I might get a lot of hate for being a spoiled brat, I’m okay with it. I just think about everything going wrong and me ending up wasting my dads money and disappointing them in the end. I feel so sorry and guilty being with my man while I don’t know if I’ll even have the courage to get out and be confident enough to be independent.He seems to be very worried and a bit impatient. We won’t be able to meet for another 2-3 years even if I can get out.We were both dating to marry but when he went to the states, everything got too big. I do love him genuinely a lot but sometimes feels like I’m dragging him around the maze. He’s not settled either, he’d offer I won’t have to work and just be his wife but I’m not that dumb to rely solely on a man in a new country. He’s not pushy about it, he just sees me being anxious about everything going wrong and assures me he’ll be there to help me in the end so I won’t have to worry.I know some of you would tell be to “ check reality “ and just push it through and work my ass out. I know how it is, I have to work and all but since I’ve not done any at all, I don’t even know if I’m capable of. Even Sch projects are hard for me. I just said this to show I’m very anxious person and an over-thinker.I don’t know what I want from this post. Any advice or opinions would be nice.Tldr; never worked in life, in a ldrs with a guy I used to date locally whose religion my family is strongly against of. Lives in a shitty third world country with daddy’s money, dad offered to let me study abroad to continue my degree but I’m scared because I’ve been a spoiled b my entire life and don’t want to work 9-5 to survive. Help