Meeting female friend from online gamer group this month, how do I express romantic interest subtly in a "non-date" setting.

Hello, you can check my post history if you want more specifics on my scenario, but basically I'm going to be visiting my female friend that I know from an online gamer group with my buddies from school. Ostensibly the trip is so I can visit family, and while that's not technically a lie, my actual goal is to hang out with her for a few hours and basically become a real person in her life with a physical form rather than a voice on discord.

I told her I would be visiting this month and I asked if she would be comfortable spending a few hours together, she said as long as it doesn't overlap with a family trip she has planned then she would be okay with that. To be clear, I didnt phrase this invitation romantically, I'm not trying to trick her into a date or anything (although that might as well be what I'm doing in hindsight /--/_) but I would like to make it subtly understood that I desire her without saying it outright, so that when I do confess my feelings it doesn't come as a surprise. I already tried doing so via discord, but there are limits to this and the presence of my buddies makes this difficult. I guess I know the basics: lots of eye contact, listening with genuine interest, opening doors, paying the cost of tickets or food, etc. But as my previous posts express my experience with women is very limited, so I would really prefer some advise.

To elaborate on the whole "tricking into date" I mean that the things I would like to do: visit a museum and peruse some vinyls, I happen to know specifically are two activites she specifically enjoys (I've been doing my homework). I would also like to maybe walk around a park and get some kind of meal, it's these activities that make me feel like I'm either fooling her into a date (to me these are inherently romantic activities) but I dont think I have another option. If we only went to a museum or a vinyl shop, I dont think I could create intimacy, you know? Part of me hopes she understands the subtext of my plans (doing things she specifically enjoys followed by typically romantic activities). Am I overthinking it? Will it come off as creepy?

TLDR: basically the title question.



Submitted April 03, 2022 at 02:12AM

Hello, you can check my post history if you want more specifics on my scenario, but basically I'm going to be visiting my female friend that I know from an online gamer group with my buddies from school. Ostensibly the trip is so I can visit family, and while that's not technically a lie, my actual goal is to hang out with her for a few hours and basically become a real person in her life with a physical form rather than a voice on discord.I told her I would be visiting this month and I asked if she would be comfortable spending a few hours together, she said as long as it doesn't overlap with a family trip she has planned then she would be okay with that. To be clear, I didnt phrase this invitation romantically, I'm not trying to trick her into a date or anything (although that might as well be what I'm doing in hindsight /--/_) but I would like to make it subtly understood that I desire her without saying it outright, so that when I do confess my feelings it doesn't come as a surprise. I already tried doing so via discord, but there are limits to this and the presence of my buddies makes this difficult. I guess I know the basics: lots of eye contact, listening with genuine interest, opening doors, paying the cost of tickets or food, etc. But as my previous posts express my experience with women is very limited, so I would really prefer some advise.To elaborate on the whole "tricking into date" I mean that the things I would like to do: visit a museum and peruse some vinyls, I happen to know specifically are two activites she specifically enjoys (I've been doing my homework). I would also like to maybe walk around a park and get some kind of meal, it's these activities that make me feel like I'm either fooling her into a date (to me these are inherently romantic activities) but I dont think I have another option. If we only went to a museum or a vinyl shop, I dont think I could create intimacy, you know? Part of me hopes she understands the subtext of my plans (doing things she specifically enjoys followed by typically romantic activities). Am I overthinking it? Will it come off as creepy?TLDR: basically the title question.
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