I feel sick when having sex with her

So I’m 21m she’s 22f and the only time we’ve had sex was when I lost my virginity 4 months ago when I lost my virginity to her. I was very reluctant to lose it to her because she wasn’t a virgin and I wanted it to be special for her. I wanted to have our first time together and have the experience every guy values of taking a girls virginity.

When we were having sex that one time I couldn’t stop think of her fucking another dude that another dudes dick was in her reminding me some dudes cum was where I am and it made me feel like throwing up. I couldn’t even look at her and I was really struggling and my gf obviously noticed and she’s been hurt since I quit it short. We haven’t had sex since and I felt so gross and took the longest shower. I feel dirty like I had those guys dicks on mine it was weird lol. I feel dirty and i feel like no other girl will love me after I did this. I wish I just found a virgin but luck wasn’t on my side in falling in love with a virgin I should have started sooner in hs. It would have been so sweet if we were younger and both virgins. I’ll never have that and I feel like a loser I will never take a girls virginity as a virgin in my life.

My friends were right you’re a loser if you lose your virginity to a non virgin and out of hs. Maybe I deserve this, this is all I’m worth to stay with a guys leftovers.

I need a second opinion help please? We’ve been together for about a year now



Submitted December 20, 2021 at 01:55AM

So I’m 21m she’s 22f and the only time we’ve had sex was when I lost my virginity 4 months ago when I lost my virginity to her. I was very reluctant to lose it to her because she wasn’t a virgin and I wanted it to be special for her. I wanted to have our first time together and have the experience every guy values of taking a girls virginity.When we were having sex that one time I couldn’t stop think of her fucking another dude that another dudes dick was in her reminding me some dudes cum was where I am and it made me feel like throwing up. I couldn’t even look at her and I was really struggling and my gf obviously noticed and she’s been hurt since I quit it short. We haven’t had sex since and I felt so gross and took the longest shower. I feel dirty like I had those guys dicks on mine it was weird lol. I feel dirty and i feel like no other girl will love me after I did this. I wish I just found a virgin but luck wasn’t on my side in falling in love with a virgin I should have started sooner in hs. It would have been so sweet if we were younger and both virgins. I’ll never have that and I feel like a loser I will never take a girls virginity as a virgin in my life.My friends were right you’re a loser if you lose your virginity to a non virgin and out of hs. Maybe I deserve this, this is all I’m worth to stay with a guys leftovers.I need a second opinion help please? We’ve been together for about a year now
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