/u/aethelar on Nice to see a well informed article about asexuality on the BBC

I don't know if her situation is exactly the same as mine, but it sounds very similar and I don't feel 'numb' is negative in the way that you're thinking.

For me, sex is sometimes horrible. Like she said - so repulsive the idea of it makes you freak out, and if you try anyway, it can physically as well as mentally hurt. It feels like terrifyingly painful overstimulation and it absolutely has to stop.

But, sometimes it's not. It feels a bit icky. Or stimulation, but not painful overstimulation, just odd. 'Numb' in that context means 'less physical or mental reaction' in exactly the same way as painkillers numb pain.

So, I get where you're coming from - feeling numb because you've repressed your response in order to have sex with someone sounds worrying. But feeling numb and therefore being able to have sex with someone is different, and I don't think it has to be bad. My partner likes sex, and I like making him happy with sex. Some days I can't. Some days I can. Some days I can, but I don't want to, so I don't. So long as he never forces me when I don't want to - which he never would - there's nothing unhealthy about it.





May 09, 2021 at 11:15PM
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