/u/thesmellofdust on I know I'm asexual, but don't know if I'm aromantic too???

I've been thinking of the way to ask this where the tone of voice is with kindness. But it's hard to get the correct tone when writing. I hope it comes through as intended.

Do you need to decide right away if you are aromantic or not?

I'm in a similar place as you in my life. I love fictional characters mostly because I know I'll never have to meet them. I'm on the extreme end of the introvert scale. If it was 100 years ago, I would be one of those people who never spoke or make eye contact and lived in a hut in the woods with chickens. Actually, I think I'm that way now. Only with geese and sheep as well as the chickens. This is a big part of making me wonder if I'm aromantic or just antisocial or both.

And yet, I would like to find another person I could trust enough to spend the rest of my life living with. Someone who can understand that I'm not going to speak for days and this doesn't mean anything bad about them. And I would in tern accept their natural tendencies and we would live together and build a life together but be individuals and platonic. I don't know if that dream is romantic or not.

But I have decided I don't need to decide just now. I feel a lot of pressure in my self and my social interactions to not be single. But it's okay to be single. Make friends without having to pursue romantic relationships. It's okay to wait and see what happens. At least, I hope it is because that's the path I'm trying.





April 11, 2021 at 11:32PM

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