How can i get over him?

Hi, so i was in a relationship with this person (I'll just call him Jon here). I'm 16F he's 18M. First relationship I've ever had, first person I've ever loved this way. I loved him for a while before I thought we might actually be able to be in a relationship together. I asked him out, he accepted, and we started dating. Very shortly after, he told me he wanted to be my boyfriend, but he had a few conditions that i should know about before, just so that I knew what i was going to get into if we actually got into a long-term committed relationship. Basically, he said that he wanted a relationship where he could still be with other girls and introduce them into the relationship (with my approval) emotionally/sexually. But me being with other guys would be considered cheating. Btw I have nothing against relationships like this but i just don't want to be in one. Just saying in case it seems like i don't respect poly relationships, because i do. I told him i couldn't do that, i asked him if it was absolutely imperative that he had this type of relationship and he said yes, he sort of low-key dissed me for being too "close-minded", and now we're just friends... Now, i don't really know how to feel. I thought i was so close to having something really good with Jon, but now I can't because of him wanting one thing and me wanting the opposite. I'm having a bunch of mixed feelings rn, i keep trying to tell myself I would have been miserable in that relationship, i dodged a bullet, etc. etc... But its not working too well. I'm trying to move on and slowly but surely I'm getting over it. But since he's the first person I've ever loved this much, let alone considered being in a serious relationship with, it hurts. And what's even worse is that i started to realise only after that he's sort of selfish and would rather be admired more than have a two way relationship w me. I'm not even sure if he liked me as much as i liked him now. So basically im just asking what i should do to get over a relationship like this? Any and all advice is welcome. Also, I'm probably going to post this on another sub just in case I don't get any advice here, so if you see this twice that's probably why. Thanks in advance guys.

Submitted November 02, 2020 at 12:14AM

Hi, so i was in a relationship with this person (I'll just call him Jon here). I'm 16F he's 18M. First relationship I've ever had, first person I've ever loved this way. I loved him for a while before I thought we might actually be able to be in a relationship together. I asked him out, he accepted, and we started dating. Very shortly after, he told me he wanted to be my boyfriend, but he had a few conditions that i should know about before, just so that I knew what i was going to get into if we actually got into a long-term committed relationship. Basically, he said that he wanted a relationship where he could still be with other girls and introduce them into the relationship (with my approval) emotionally/sexually. But me being with other guys would be considered cheating. Btw I have nothing against relationships like this but i just don't want to be in one. Just saying in case it seems like i don't respect poly relationships, because i do. I told him i couldn't do that, i asked him if it was absolutely imperative that he had this type of relationship and he said yes, he sort of low-key dissed me for being too "close-minded", and now we're just friends... Now, i don't really know how to feel. I thought i was so close to having something really good with Jon, but now I can't because of him wanting one thing and me wanting the opposite. I'm having a bunch of mixed feelings rn, i keep trying to tell myself I would have been miserable in that relationship, i dodged a bullet, etc. etc... But its not working too well. I'm trying to move on and slowly but surely I'm getting over it. But since he's the first person I've ever loved this much, let alone considered being in a serious relationship with, it hurts. And what's even worse is that i started to realise only after that he's sort of selfish and would rather be admired more than have a two way relationship w me. I'm not even sure if he liked me as much as i liked him now. So basically im just asking what i should do to get over a relationship like this? Any and all advice is welcome. Also, I'm probably going to post this on another sub just in case I don't get any advice here, so if you see this twice that's probably why. Thanks in advance guys.