How can i tell if somebody is actually serious about a date?

So I am 25 and a transgender woman (I'm fairly passable when i try and I'm interested in women if that's relevant).

I have been on and off dating sites and general attempts at dating for the past 5 years (mostly on apps though). In that time i have had 5 'dates'. 4 stood me up and the one that didn't thought we were meeting as friends. I get the transgender thing is off putting to people and i'm cool with that, i'm different i get that. I am upfront with people about it and i am open about it. If people aren't okay with it (assuming they even reply after i mention it) i don't press things and leave them be and yet I only ever seem to get stood up.

Am i just socially inept? Are they panicking and agreeing not knowing what to say? Is this just what dating is like for most people? I'm quite willing to accept this is either due to me being an idiot or this is just what online dating is like but if there is anything i'm missing i'd be super grateful for any pointers.



Submitted May 23, 2020 at 12:02AM

So I am 25 and a transgender woman (I'm fairly passable when i try and I'm interested in women if that's relevant).I have been on and off dating sites and general attempts at dating for the past 5 years (mostly on apps though). In that time i have had 5 'dates'. 4 stood me up and the one that didn't thought we were meeting as friends. I get the transgender thing is off putting to people and i'm cool with that, i'm different i get that. I am upfront with people about it and i am open about it. If people aren't okay with it (assuming they even reply after i mention it) i don't press things and leave them be and yet I only ever seem to get stood up.Am i just socially inept? Are they panicking and agreeing not knowing what to say? Is this just what dating is like for most people? I'm quite willing to accept this is either due to me being an idiot or this is just what online dating is like but if there is anything i'm missing i'd be super grateful for any pointers.

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