When to throw in the towel?

I’m writing on here for some advice. I have been married for 10 years almost. I’m 28 so obviously I got married young. Surprisingly most of our issues have started more recently and don’t have much to do with age. Things started getting tense about 5 years into our marriage when we were trying to have a baby for a while. It’s stressful knowing it’s all because of your pcos and no fault of your husband. Looking back I think I should’ve left him before I had kids due to his anger issues. I.E: punching walls, breaking my waterglobe & also pushing me into a table. He said pushing me into the table was an accident and he didn’t think I’d fall. But it’s almost too late. Anyway, We tried for 7 years and then our precious son was stillborn. For a while we were pretty strong. He said we needed each other to get through it and I believed that. His death truly broke me. When I occasionally cry (mostly now from hormones and missing him even more as the family grows) now he just sits there and says nothing. If you’ve ever buried your child you would know how this hurts. Anyways, We then had another child and she is great. Here’s where I’m stuck and in a hard spot to leave. I am now 6 weeks pregnant with #3 and he just told me he hopes this baby dies too. All because I am hormonal and said “fuck you” to him because I didn’t hear him banging on the door when he came home with our lunch. He couldn’t get the door open himself. I didn’t know this because I was in my room playing with my 1 year old and had the tv on. I also always tell him to text me before he gets in if he will need help. When I get to the door he is angry as usual and got mad, so I said f you. I know now that was wrong. I told him I was playing with our daughter I didn’t hear you. He then tells me he hopes this baby dies too. I’m just broken. I don’t know what to do. Just looking for advice.

Submitted March 01, 2020 at 11:37PM

I’m writing on here for some advice. I have been married for 10 years almost. I’m 28 so obviously I got married young. Surprisingly most of our issues have started more recently and don’t have much to do with age. Things started getting tense about 5 years into our marriage when we were trying to have a baby for a while. It’s stressful knowing it’s all because of your pcos and no fault of your husband. Looking back I think I should’ve left him before I had kids due to his anger issues. I.E: punching walls, breaking my waterglobe & also pushing me into a table. He said pushing me into the table was an accident and he didn’t think I’d fall. But it’s almost too late. Anyway, We tried for 7 years and then our precious son was stillborn. For a while we were pretty strong. He said we needed each other to get through it and I believed that. His death truly broke me. When I occasionally cry (mostly now from hormones and missing him even more as the family grows) now he just sits there and says nothing. If you’ve ever buried your child you would know how this hurts. Anyways, We then had another child and she is great. Here’s where I’m stuck and in a hard spot to leave. I am now 6 weeks pregnant with #3 and he just told me he hopes this baby dies too. All because I am hormonal and said “fuck you” to him because I didn’t hear him banging on the door when he came home with our lunch. He couldn’t get the door open himself. I didn’t know this because I was in my room playing with my 1 year old and had the tv on. I also always tell him to text me before he gets in if he will need help. When I get to the door he is angry as usual and got mad, so I said f you. I know now that was wrong. I told him I was playing with our daughter I didn’t hear you. He then tells me he hopes this baby dies too. I’m just broken. I don’t know what to do. Just looking for advice.