How do you stop caring.

So my ex and I had a really great and meaningful relationship. We often laughed at the same jokes and had the same life philosophy. We were so much in love with each other that we started planning our future together. That white picket fence home with high ceilings and a two story house. The Saint Bernard we'd have as a family dog. I've never had a relationship with anyone like I did with her so when we separated, it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to endure in my life. Now, I know this must be overly said but I'm not used to depending on others or even letting them into my world. Bonds are something I'm good at. But with her, I never felt so free, so loved and cared for. But eventually, it just didn't work out. I'd rather not say the reasons why but for some context, it wasn't for anything unfaithful or promiscuous. We just didn't work out. On the day we broke up, we had a huge argument for several weeks after and had a bad falling out. It's been about 6-7 months now that we've broken up and I just recently found out she's going into military. I find myself feeling the same anxious, worrisome feeling that I used to feel when I was freshly wounded when she broke up with me. That feeling in your heart as if bees were tickling your heart with their wings. This is the best way I can describe it. I'm talking to someone new and they're great. I know I still care for my ex and love her but if I had the chance, I wouldn't want to get back together. Maybe somewhere in the distant future when we're completely different people but not now. The question I want to ask is, how do I stop caring? I hate feeling this anxious feeling for a past someone. How do I just turn off these emotions for her. I just wanna stop caring for her. I'm sure she doesn't value me as I do her. Damn it.



Submitted July 21, 2019 at 11:05PM

So my ex and I had a really great and meaningful relationship. We often laughed at the same jokes and had the same life philosophy. We were so much in love with each other that we started planning our future together. That white picket fence home with high ceilings and a two story house. The Saint Bernard we'd have as a family dog. I've never had a relationship with anyone like I did with her so when we separated, it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to endure in my life. Now, I know this must be overly said but I'm not used to depending on others or even letting them into my world. Bonds are something I'm good at. But with her, I never felt so free, so loved and cared for. But eventually, it just didn't work out. I'd rather not say the reasons why but for some context, it wasn't for anything unfaithful or promiscuous. We just didn't work out. On the day we broke up, we had a huge argument for several weeks after and had a bad falling out. It's been about 6-7 months now that we've broken up and I just recently found out she's going into military. I find myself feeling the same anxious, worrisome feeling that I used to feel when I was freshly wounded when she broke up with me. That feeling in your heart as if bees were tickling your heart with their wings. This is the best way I can describe it. I'm talking to someone new and they're great. I know I still care for my ex and love her but if I had the chance, I wouldn't want to get back together. Maybe somewhere in the distant future when we're completely different people but not now. The question I want to ask is, how do I stop caring? I hate feeling this anxious feeling for a past someone. How do I just turn off these emotions for her. I just wanna stop caring for her. I'm sure she doesn't value me as I do her. Damn it.
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