Me (24M) and my situationship (24F). Too keep talking or to let go for a bit in hopes of it returning to the way it was?

TL;DR: A girl I have been seeing for 6 months has been distant recently due to her finishing grad school, family issues and job searching. Should I keep talking to her or take a step back?

Hey everyone, I have been seeing this girl since last October. Everything was great from the start and I didn't have very strong feelings for her until about February. She had strong feelings since November, but in February, she started becoming for distant because we never had the talk about what we were and she thought I wasn't into her.

In February, we both hooked up with other people. When I found this out, we had a talk near the end of March. The talk consisted of me telling her the feelings I have for her and that I saw us being something really fun and exciting. A relationship and all. She said that she saw that with me too, but that she was trying to pull back a bit because we didn't share how we felt (I believe this is both of our faults). She also said that night that she is not ready for a relationship at that point due to the things in her life in the paragraph below. I agreed as I don't want to force anything, I want our relationship to be fun and exciting like it was the first four months.

Since that talk, she has had a crazy busy life. She moved apartments, had her friends in town for her birthday, and has since been studying for her masters finals and thesis presentation and working at her internship on top of applying for jobs and running into some personal family issues.

We have hung out one time since the meeting in late March. We went out on the town and overall it was a great night. I tried to not bring any of our relationship stuff up and keep it light and fun which we did. We text once or twice a day currently and want to hang out with her again but dont want to become a burden or annoyance in her life. But she has also been going out with her friends during the weekends and feels like she doesn't want to spend time with me. She only has so many days off these couple of months and agree she should spend them with friends, but I am truly feeling like an afterthought or a last resort.

This leads me to my question, She graduates in Mid May and will be starting her job hopefully in May as well. I am tired of feeling like the last resort in her life, even though her life is extremely hectic right now. I am trying my best to go with the flow in this relationship but I cannot help but feel like I am annoying her / being to needy to ask to hangout once a week.



Submitted April 25, 2023 at 12:14AM

TL;DR: A girl I have been seeing for 6 months has been distant recently due to her finishing grad school, family issues and job searching. Should I keep talking to her or take a step back?Hey everyone, I have been seeing this girl since last October. Everything was great from the start and I didn't have very strong feelings for her until about February. She had strong feelings since November, but in February, she started becoming for distant because we never had the talk about what we were and she thought I wasn't into her.In February, we both hooked up with other people. When I found this out, we had a talk near the end of March. The talk consisted of me telling her the feelings I have for her and that I saw us being something really fun and exciting. A relationship and all. She said that she saw that with me too, but that she was trying to pull back a bit because we didn't share how we felt (I believe this is both of our faults). She also said that night that she is not ready for a relationship at that point due to the things in her life in the paragraph below. I agreed as I don't want to force anything, I want our relationship to be fun and exciting like it was the first four months.Since that talk, she has had a crazy busy life. She moved apartments, had her friends in town for her birthday, and has since been studying for her masters finals and thesis presentation and working at her internship on top of applying for jobs and running into some personal family issues.We have hung out one time since the meeting in late March. We went out on the town and overall it was a great night. I tried to not bring any of our relationship stuff up and keep it light and fun which we did. We text once or twice a day currently and want to hang out with her again but dont want to become a burden or annoyance in her life. But she has also been going out with her friends during the weekends and feels like she doesn't want to spend time with me. She only has so many days off these couple of months and agree she should spend them with friends, but I am truly feeling like an afterthought or a last resort.This leads me to my question, She graduates in Mid May and will be starting her job hopefully in May as well. I am tired of feeling like the last resort in her life, even though her life is extremely hectic right now. I am trying my best to go with the flow in this relationship but I cannot help but feel like I am annoying her / being to needy to ask to hangout once a week.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Add Comments, Posts, Links... etc.

Popular posts from this blog

The difference between being right and being understood

My boyfriend and I are 28. We’ve been together for about 1.5 years and recently moved in together. He’s a pretty patient and easygoing person (Type B) whereas I’m more particular (Type A). Of course there are two sides to every trait, and my Type A nature benefits us in some ways too. Like all couples, we have differences in perspective or preference. When this happens, he will usually say something like “I disagree (with your perspective) but fine.” I tend to push the issue in an attempt to get him to understand where I’m coming from. This escalates the disagreement into a fight because he perceives it as me trying to be “right”. I truly just want to be understood (and I want to understand where he’s coming from) so I’m looking for more of a dialogue whereas he avoids conflict and just wants it to be over as quickly as possible. His general approach is “agree to disagree” but that doesn’t make sense to me when it’s an issue that will keep coming up and requires compromise. I’m n...
Read more

My (27f) gf (27f) is getting tired of me not sharing intimate/ personal info about me

I’ve always been extremely private and introverted. We have more than a year together and we’ve been living together for like 6 months, we get along pretty good and I’m really in love with her, however I can not seem to open up... and I can tell it’s frustrating to her by the way she tells me it bothers her that she feels she’s the only one committed and the one that’s always sharing... At this point I don’t even know if it is that I’ve gotten too used to it, to the point I’ve became lazy to talk about myself or give any genuine personal opinion... it sucks, really, I need to communicate better... Where do I start? Tl;dr: I can’t be completely intimate with my gf and its frustrating her, I need to communicate better because I really love her... where to start? Submitted April 25, 2019 at 06:02AM I’ve always been extremely private and introverted. We have more than a year together and we’ve been living together for like 6 months, we get along pretty good and I’m really in love ...
Read more

My (23M) girlfriend (25F) relationship is confusing to me. I might be the problem, or maybe we are just incompatible.

I met my girlfriend after a few serious breakups that led me to change both intentionally and unintentionally over a few years. For better and for worse. She had just gotten out of an engagement with a verbally and physically abusive man who had a cocaine problem. We have been together about 8 months now. We hit it off and spent a lot of time together but she began to push our relationship as if there were a time clock for milestones. I was pressed beyond my comfort zone and went with it because of my affection for her. My living situation fell apart and I lost a few thousand dollars to shit roommates right around the time she and I met and she offered to let me stay with her. I agreed with some resistance. I pay for food, help her with bills, and throw money toward rent while trying to get back on my feet. As long as we have been together she has gotten more possessive, angry, and irrational. She is dealing with shit from her engagement and I feel shes looking for a level of seriou...
Read more